Eye of the Hurricane

Travels
Between Phil and You
September 3 at 8:10am
Good morning! Hope you made it there easily…and didn’t get drenched. Gorgeous morning here – typical pre-big blow.
Thank you for calling. Sharing. oxxx
Phil September 3 at 5:21pm
Got home fine. Weather was nothing. At the gym and then gonna cook. Will take pictures. Hope you had a good fay. Did Hurricane Earl pay a visit?

September 3 at 5:51pm
Hey, there sweet man!
Quiet day at work. Typical Friday before a long weekend. Got out early!
Earl’s knocking! Raining a little…hunkered down at home…seems like Long Island took most of the punch out of it. They’re now saying less than an inch of rain and 30 mph wind…we get more than that from a Nor’easter. Should be all done by morning.
Listening to favorite old folk songs on Youtube…feeling very virtuous for not posting anything about second chances, new sexy men etc. Posted one on my wall.  ooxxt

David Wilcox “Eye of the Hurricane” posted to my wall

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hP1MNdpw0rE
[He texted me a photo of the huge lobster tails he made for supper]
September 3 at 9:10pm
Wow…those lobster tails rock! Thanks for the pix. Poetry on a plate. *drool* I’ve never seen anything like that except… you know. I want to grab them and put them in my mouth and…oops. Sorry. Forgot you are married on the weekends. 🙂

Baseball rivals

We spent the day talking about mountains we’ve visited… then retirement planning!  Zzzzz…. but it was nice to talk about random topics with him.  In the evening we got down to the good stuff… BASEBALL!  
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September 2 at 9:04pm
I’m chilling at home…drinking an iced chai latte…reading back over things you’ve said. Watching the baseball game… Sox are ahead! dreaming of you and me at a Red Sox vs. Yankees game in October, and doing wild things to you before and after.
  
Phil September 2 at 9:15pm
CooL!!!!!!!!!!! Yankees win of course. Sox won’t be playing in October.

September 2 at 9:20pm
You are a BRAT! Very cute, but still a brat.
Last series of the season is Yankees here… getting their ass kicked by the Sox, Oct.1,2,3. Besides, not who wins that matters…but who you get to lick right afterwards!
Phil September 2 at 9:35pm
Ass licking is much better than kicking. 🙂
September 2 at 10:09pm
You are so right. Just for that, I looked up blue silk bathrobes with big Yankees emblems on them…try to imagine me in one. or out of it…
Phil September 2 at 10:21pm
Oooh!
  
September 2 at 11:06pm
Going to bed…taking my phone. Just in case. If not, have a great night. xxoo

He called me on his drive home… once again, we chatted about food and music and life.  Nothing sexy… can’t quite figure it out, but I’m not bringing it up if he doesn’t.  It is wonderful to hear his voice, whatever he says.  

Afterglow

I posted a video on my wall in the early morning hours.  
“It’s Getting Better All the Time” by The Beatles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXkokyBlktA


Good Morning
Between You and Phil

Phil September 1 at 9:05am
Good Morning! Hope you have a great day. Last night was something else. Was fun. Have to get some serious work done today. Off to the gym in a bit and then out to dinner with friends. Tomorrow is a concert and then the drive home. Hope the storm does not soak the weekend. Should be past and gone by friday.
  
September 1 at 11:56am
Good morning! Wowzers. I feel so good today!!!!!
And you are the only person in the entire world who knows why.
Thank you for last night’s discussion. Very productive.
It is very tempting to invite you to lunch. On FB…or on the phone.  There are at least 10 things I want to tell you…things I want to do…things I want to ask you to do. But I will be good, let you get work done.
 I posted another video on my wall.  “I Feel Good” by James Brown

Phil September 1 at 12:16pm
Great workout! Feel invigorated, muscles all pumped up, heart banging, wonderful. So tell me tell me tell me. Big ass German beers coming up! Can’t wait. Been dyeing to try this place. Still gotta drop and do some core work. Gotta keep the middle part strong

September 1 at 2:32pm
Oh…sweet man…it is so hot to think of you all pumped up. And writing to me in the midst of it! I feel like the luckiest girl in the world today. Of course…right now it is so so hot to think of you at all. Doing anything. Or nothing.
Great menu for the German place. Hope the food is great.  But hope it makes you think of something else you could be eating if you weren’t 600 miles away. ME! I was eyeing the sausages…made me think of what I could eat. YOU! My mouth wrapped around you, my tongue doing it’s magic…my fingers in interesting places nearby. Moving, sucking, licking…biting just a little, twirling my fingers up your ass, around your balls…making it hotter…harder…SHIT. I can not even read a restaurant menu with jumping off the deep end!
September 1 at 2:37pm
I do long for the day when I am not typing in some tiny FB chat window or talking on a dying cellphone. When I can touch your skin and see you move and feel… Though at the same time, I dread it because I can’t be thin and 25 years old in person. *sigh* But I am working on trusting you that it won’t be a problem…

September 1 at 2:47pm
Last night…last night…my mind was totally blown. And that does NOT happen. I can usually hold on to bits of my brain…even during the hottest action. And much of the time, when it was over, it’s over. But I lost it. Completely… and I am still thinking about it. And wanting more.
First, you inspire me. I have never posted a video to my FB status before. And I picked one because it was exactly how I felt…maniac…hot for you… moving… pounding. And it turns out to be a song you know…one you like…one you understand. One that makes you hot for me. That’s the way this is going be. Wow. Music is suddenly alive for me again. And in a whole new way.
Second, I was soaked as I have never been before when you called me. Just from your voice. In the first 10 seconds. I could not tell you I was having a major internal explosion while you are saying “hello, gosh your voice is a little different” but I can tell you now. I am not a phone person. The web is my domain. But I loved it last night. Pondering which is better… FB or phone… Hmmm…hard to say. Any thoughts?
You do something to me…you have the right key to unlock my innermost places and shed light and heat…it is HOT! You have some kind of special sexy superpower. I want you to use it for good. On me.
And our typing. You reading about me being wild…not judging… Replaying it now… marveling at how we can talk about anything and everything. Boggling at how you can follow where I take you. Eagerly. And how my words stayed with me – I was able to set the scene and stick with it even when I was about to explode. You get it and roll with it…and make it even better than it was. The wildest night I can remember, and you make it better. In text. Damn. Because it is your strong shoulders I see now, bite now…your hips pounding on mine…your hands…and your smile I see when I send you places you’ve never been before, put ideas in your head… MEXICO…tongues…twists…one bed… BOOM@!
September 1 at 3:00pm
Smiling at us talking on the phone about both having been in the same bar in Boston the same July 4th weekend. How you were the one who kept the others out of trouble, and I was always talking with that guy. Freaking out that you might have been one bar stool over and I never saw you. We may discover other moments like this…like a bad movie where we keep missing each other. But screw that…we’re here now!
Thinking about what might have happened. Maybe your buddy chats with me at the bar, asks where I’m from, and says, “Huh? One of the guys at my table is from there. Small world, eh? I’ll go get him.” And I think “Oh, great…one of the doofs from home.” Then you walk toward me…and your eyes widen…we would both smile…where would it go from there? What would you have done? Perhaps fodder for another conversation…
September 1 at 3:05pm
I have good intentions. I meant to let you work today. I meant to get work done myself. But I can’t… I don’t know how long this will last, but as long as it does, I am riding it like the crest of the best wave Oahu’s North Shore ever rolled. And then lying naked on the hot sand with a big smile on my face.
Phil September 1 at 3:09pm
I liked both FB and the phone. I have an active imagination so I can visualize. I could see everything that was happening last night. I could smell the room, feel the sweat, see it all. Was very easy to follow along. 

I would never be judgmental. There is not much I have not considered sexually and not much I would not try under the right circumstances. No pain, just pleasure. My room smelled like cum last nite. I kind of liked it. Like the way it smells and tastes. 

I checked out the menu too. I am more impressed with the beer but will have the Brat wurst thinking about you sucking and licking and fingers twirling in my ass. Sounds like great fun! Can’t wait to hear of other adventures. I have nothing that exciting to tell. Wish I did. That situation was very hot. I’ll remember that for a long time. Will be masturbation tool. Sure was last nite. Hope you are enjoying your day. Hope you stay moist all day long.
[I sent him photos of various Mexican beaches] 

September 1 at 4:25pm
Silly blue “Kool-aid” colored water…white sand…a place I will never forget!
September 1 at 4:39pm
You’ve had adventures. You have things to talk about. I’ve certainly enjoyed hearing about your adventures with that high school girl!
I see adventures in your future. With your imagination and powers of description, I can give you a prompt or you can tell me about something that you’ve been wondering about…and we can roll with it! We can be whoever we want, wherever we want…and play it out. If you want to…

Phil September 1 at 4:39pm
Love the caribbean. Been to most of it. Great beaches, great drinks, great fun 
September 1 at 4:50pm
The most beautiful beach I’ve ever seen was Trunk Bay on St. John, USVI. Did you ever get there?
September 1 at 5:42pm
What does drinking do to you? Mellow? Wilder? Not mean, I hope…
Phil September 1 at 5:50pm
Been to St Johns, not sure what beach. The German place is awesome!
Phil September 1 at 9:00pm
Hey you hot little wench! Hope you had a good evening. Dinner was wonderful, beers were great, german music, good company, was fun. Thought of you when my bratwurst came
Phil September 1 at 9:08pm
Had a great dinner and drinks. Now I want to be licked, stroked, sucked, fucked. Lower that pussy over my face. Give me access to your pussy and ass. Really in the mood to feel your fingers thrusting and twirling up my ass. Damn I’m horny – thinking about Mexico – dicks on my cheek, cum coated tits, hot pussy, young pussy, hot tight asses, damn
September 1 at 9:10pm
Wench, huh? Wench?! Hee! I will wench you…you handsome man. Right now I could fuck you right into next week. Just woke up from a nap. Wish it had been you waking me up. Slowly…deeply.
I am not going to touch the line about the bratwurst coming… sounds messy. 🙂
My evening has sucked so far. But it is getting better now.
Phil September 1 at 9:17pm
Sorry to hear that. You should be sucking me.
  
September 1 at 9:28pm
Having Thai food…delivered…hot stuff. Wish I could order you delivered…you’d look great on my doorstep…with sauce
Phil September 1 at 9:33pm
I love spicy food. Love Thai and Indian yummy.
  
September 1 at 9:47pm
I would like to be eating spicy food right now with you…naked…there would be lots of spills down my front that you could lick off…and then you’d get sloppy and spill some and I’d have to go after that…can’t waste food…slurp.
There’s this website called Foodler.com. Do you have that in D.C.? They get restaurants to list with them, then coordinate delivery. So each restaurant doesn’t have to handle delivery, insurance, credit cards etc. There are 179 places that will bring us dinner…too easy. We do Thai, Italian, Irish, Chinese, sushi…even a place that bring breakfast! BACON!
  
Phil September 1 at 10:04pm
Yea have those here too. I like thai, indian, chinese, sushi, mexican, italian 
September 1 at 10:06pm
Thinking about what you will taste like…salty…spicy… passionfruit!
  
September 1 at 10:09pm
Friend posted a fun video…all these dance scenes from dozens of movies, pieced together really well, to the Footloose music. Made me want to jump up and dance…they dump in everything – Fred Astaire, Michael Jackson, Mama Mia, White Nights, Dirty Dancing, Flashdance, Step Up…on and on…
Wish I could be dancing with you…fast then slow and slower…
Phil September 1 at 10:09pm
Generally sweet. I have tasted before
  
September 1 at 10:12pm
“Generally sweet…” Makes sense to me…you are so sweet in so many ways!
Phil September 1 at 10:16pm
I’m sure it’s what I eat but never trasted it bitter or bad, always kind of sweet
September 1 at 10:27pm
Another beautiful beach…Waipeo Valley on the Big Island of Hawai’i. Black sand…wild horses…and you look up this huge jungle valley at 1500 ft high cliffs and a waterfall…paradise!
Our tour guide was a local…asked him if it ever gets cold there. He said it gets down to 60 degrees sometimes! Heh. I said he didn’t know what cold was then, and he laughed, saying “Lady, I did my basic training at Great Lakes in February – I know cold!”
Phil September 1 at 10:38pm
Only been to Oahu. Would like to see the others. Gonna freeze my ass off after I move.
September 1 at 10:40pm
Whenever you feel cold, you can ping me or ring me up. I will fix it. You’ll be hot in no time flat.
September 1 at 10:43pm
You just need the right coat and boots. Get one of those full-length down coats that make people look like the Michelin man. In black. With a hood. And boots from LL Bean or someplace serious. Makes a big difference.

September 1 at 10:58pm
Sleep well…sweet man.
  
Phil September 1 at 11:02pm
Nite Sassy

Tuesday talking

Scandalous status update
Between Phil and You
August 31 at 1:19am
Wondering if I should write in my status field “Sassy just helped one guy 600 miles away shoot his wad via FB chat with her husband reading in the chair next to her desk.” 😉
My sister said my new glasses make me look like a superhero in disguise… Wonder Sass, Super Sass, Mega Sass! I certainly feel pretty powerful right now. Wheee!

Phil August 31 at 7:28am
Good morning. Gorgeous morning! Have a great day! Glad to see your status does not say that! Had to check real quick 🙂
  
August 31 at 7:37am
Good morning! It is a beautiful morning…day 3 of the heat wave. Certainly has been strangely hot recently…*fans face*
  
Phil August 31 at 7:46am
LOL, slept well last night. Can’t imagine why. Drank a ton of water, had to replace all that fluid 🙂
August 31 at 8:02am
So glad to hear you slept well. 🙂
Our sandbox is on my mind. An interesting concept. It reminds me of being an aunt. My sister has this great child. She isn’t mine. I can’t live with her or control much of what happens with her. And I miss a lot of her best moments. But I don’t have to deal with the bad moments or wash her socks. I can swoop in every now and then and spoil her.
Similar concept with us…not real life…no socks to wash…no special moments at holidays…no day-to-day…no “take out the garbage!”…just the sandbox where we can play and talk and spoil each other. Our own island, maybe…for a more grown-up phrase. You don’t have to or get to deal with me all the time, so we are free to tackle life deepest moments…but not free in other ways. Very special to each other…And what we do there can make our lives better, give us a release, fill certain needs, teach each other stuff, gather strength for the rest of life…and memories. Does that make any sense?
Off to the shower…
  
Phil August 31 at 10:28am
Who knows. Conventional wisdom says all this other stuff. Last night was exciting and fun. Having a confidant, someone to share things with is cool. I am enjoying whatever us is. Nothing wrong with that. Off to the gym with me. Time to sweat.
August 31 at 2:07pm
Eating lunch at my desk…thinking of you. Hoping you are having a good day.
I’m doing the NY Times crossword puzzle. Not good at it, but I try. People in the office do it and we have fun talking about them, and I learn things. Today I learned that Nintendo owns the Seattle Mariners. Probably should’ve known that! They are “easy” on Mondays and get harder all week. I can do Mondays, some Tuesdays, a little Wednesday and not much else. It helps me with “Jeopardy!” when I watch that with my parents.
You said you like your Kindle. What do you like to read? I used to read a lot of books. Now, I try to read a book a year, just to prove that I still can, but I don’t have the patience or time for it.
I will be home alone tonight…definitely from 5:30 to 7…maybe longer. Hubby is going out to dinner.  
  
Phil August 31 at 2:42pm
I get home around 6 or so. I read mystery kind of stuff. Probably read a book a week. I read on the bike, elliptical or treadmill and that’s an hour a day. Also read while riding the Metro. I don’t do crosswords or any of the other puzzles. I try to devote a few hours a day to some form of exercise. Just back from a 3 mile fast walk. Having dinner with a friend tomorrow and I was not sure where it was so I walked there and back. Now I know. Still have to do push ups and abs and maybe go lift some tonight. Hope to talk to you a little later!


I could not wait to get home from work.  Two minutes after I got in the door, I was at my desk, a bundle of energy, desperate to hear his voice.  I wanted a way to explain to him how I felt. Here’s what I posted to my Facebook wall  

Flashdance Manic music video


To pass the time, I spent a few minutes searching the web for tips on how to talk to a long distance lover on the phone.  Here’s what I gleaned from it: 

Speak slowly, softer, lower – think sultry
Good opening lines:
      I wish you were here
      I was thinking about that time we…
Set the scene so he can picture you – tell him where you are, what you’re wearing, what you’re doing…
Embellish
It’s okay to say you are wearing a red lace teddy even if you have on sweats
Compliment him…specific things like “your strong shoulders”
If what he is saying turns you on, tell him
Ask what he’d like you to do …make suggestions
    Tell me where to put my hands.
Ask what he is doing
Listen to the words he uses..cock?  dick?  Penis?  And repeat them back to him…
Phrases to say when you can’t think of anything else
            “Tell me more….”
            “Oh!  That feels so good…”
Or don’t say anything at all…breathe…moan…

Not very helpful.  I took a lot of deep breaths.  Practiced my “sultry voice.”  

He called my mobile phone about 6:30 pm.  I was on my back on my bed, listening to him talk.  Such a beautiful voice!  He didn’t talk about sexy stuff… he seemed strangely nervous. I made him laugh and he relaxed a little.  He’s picked up a slight Southern accent.  Oh, what that did to me!  It didn’t matter what he said, I was writhing and twitching but afraid to let on.  We shared random stories from our lives, recipes, memories, asked questions, gave answers, getting used to each other in a new medium.  His voice wrapped around me like an electric blanket… an amazing combination of hot and comforting.  My husband got home about 7:00 pm.  I shut the door to our room, but knew we had to say farewell soon.  He said he’d find me later online and was gone.  I stayed there, running over every word, breathing heavily.  Wondering why we didn’t get to sexier subjects, but deciding it was a good start.  I fell asleep.  I woke up about 10:00 pm and dashed back to my computer.  

Sexy Voice  
Between You and Phil
Phil August 31 at 9:51pm
Was wonderful to hear your sexy voice again. I enjoyed talking to you. Can’t wait for more. Can’t wait to feel your mouth on my cock, your fingers caressing my balls, finger slipping into my ass. Going to be amazing. I want you so bad


New Relationship Energy

Don’t you just love “New Relationship Energy?!”  21 messages and two chats with him today… WOW!
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Phil August 30 at 5:21am
I have a definite idea. We would of course meet outside some place. We would see each other and walk towards one another. I would hug you, kiss you on the cheek, feeling your breasts against me. We would head towards the restaurant hand in hand
Phil August 30 at 5:25am
I’m up for talking on the phone. Very up for it. Love the thought of your hands doing something much more useful than typing. Sounds hot, sexy and fun. Got me hard instantly just thinking about it!

The wall 
Between Phil and You
August 30 at 8:26am
Good morning! Another hot day here…they’re saying we may get 5 days in the 90’s! That never happens here that late. It certainly fit my mood. 😉
Here’s a video for you to watch sometime. Ignore the first 20 seconds. It may explain where I got the idea that walls are sexy. Music is edgy and good words.
It’s from the British series “Red Cap” about the UK Army police in Germany. It’s mostly about their investigations of crimes, but there is a subplot about two of the officers trying to keep their hands off each other. The woman, Jo, is a gorgeous blond, so everyone assumes she’s a dope. But she is the smartest, toughest one of the bunch…very solitary and independent and fierce. She can charm men or break their arm. The guy, Phil Roper, is the gentle, friendly one, married, allowed to have longer hair so he can do undercover work, so everyone calls him “Hippy.”
So it’s all about her learning to be less independent…and more sexy.


Dinner details
Between Phil and You

Phil August 30 at 9:39am
We would sit side by side. That way we can touch and tease. I want to run my fingers along the inside of your thigh, teasing, maybe accidentally brush my hand across your breast. Gives you the opportunity to do what you like. Would love to feel your hand slide up my leg and then boldly grab my now very hard cock in your hand. The rest of dinner would be more of the same with some seductive finger licking and looks. 

I assume, I would have a room close by. As soon as the elevator door closes, I press you against the wall, my tongue darting into your mouth. My hard cock pressing into you, your hips pushing back. My hands go to your breasts, until the door opens. 

We get into the room tossing off clothes. Your eyes are glued to my cock, my eyes taking in your breasts, seeing your aroused nipples. I push you back on the bed, spread your legs and start licking and kissing up your thighs. My tongue is licking the outside of your pussy teasing before parting your lips and tasting you. It does not take long for you to cum for the first time. I am loving your taste, smell and the motion of your body as you go over the edge again. 

You push me back saying your turn. I lay back as you stroke me and then you bring your lips to the head of my cock and give it some gentle licks before taking it into your mouth. Its all I can do not to cum right there. Your fingers are playing with my balls and ass as you continue to lick and suck me. By now I am moaning and my hips are thrusting and then just before I cum, you back away. I take a nipple in my mouth gently sucking and licking. I spread your legs with my knee as I climb between them. My cock is brushing your pussy, we are looking into each others eyes as I slowly slide inside of you. So hot and so wet. When I am in, your eyes close as we begin to move together. It does not take long, I can tell you are about to cum and I can’t hold on as I cum inside you, I feel you go too. We lie together like that and start to move again faster and harder now. Just getting started.

Phil August 30 at 9:55am
Would love to hear some stories. Never had group sex before. Not opposed just never had the opportunity. Not sure I could keep track either. Anal is fun if its done gently and patiently. Dick is the dirtiest thing you have said, loved it. You would see me get hard and stay that way. I’ve had sex outside, been watched, did it with another couple in the room, been approached by swingers. Would love to hear your fantasies. I am neither shy nor inhibited. I am gentle though and patient, will take my cues from you. I would never go any place you did not want to go. Anything that feels good is ok with me. Not into pain at all. Have to admit I have thought of slipping my tongue in your ass, was not sure if that would make you uncomfortable. Hope this helps. My dick is not only hard but throbbing. Glad you liked the pics. Continuing to work out and diet to improve the view.

Phil August 30 at 10:02am
Hope you end up with wet panties and sudden urge to go to your bunk! 🙂
Phil August 30 at 10:09am
How did you go from so sexual to nothing? Have you at least taken care of things your self? Tell me more! Wish I was in place to take things in hand. Would love to cum on your tits and lick them clean. Damn I’m horny! 
Phil August 30 at 10:11am
Looked down and I have a large wet spot on the front of my pants. Cool!
  
August 30 at 12:05pm
Busy day at the office, so quick comments. I so wish I could call in sick and be at home to respond in full to each of these messages. I have this terrible fever… between my legs. And tingling in my chest. And my breathing is all labored and I can’t keep my hands above the desk! I need a cure. Maybe an appt. with Dr. Philip?
But there is a lot to do here. Payroll…emails…meetings… such fun. not.
Your visions of dinner sound just right! Although there are probably thousands of permutations all of which would be fine if we’re together. Has anyone ever told you that you write really well? You have a fabulous way of describing it so I can exactly what is happening. I don’t want it to be all about the physical side, but that is so powerful, it may take over. And with the short timing and distance, it seems right to focus on that when we are face-to-face. Or face to tits or whatever..
I was nodding (and then breathing a bit quickly) at each step, thinking “That could work” or “Oh…that would be so HOT!” Definitely BUNK material. I should have known a military guy would be able to figure out the logistics of a dinner. I am so used to doing all the planning in my life…it’s great to have someone who can plan, and what amazing plans they are!
I will warn you that I do swear a little more, and use more evocative, dirty words, in person. Typing them just doesn’t work for me. But in person, in your ear…you may hear them.
I have also been thinking about us as teenagers…thinking about what you’ve said about our times together. I’m trying to visualize you returning to me at some point in H.S…maybe after you went into the service. Trying to put aside what was (who you are with or who I’m with or the almost insurmountable taboos…) and think of what might have been…let our chemistry take over, when I had that girl’s body. My first time was fine, but I was thinking about what it would have been like with you. Were you ever in my teenage bed?
I wonder if you would have fantasized about me for the rest of your life if you’d been inside me then. Whether it would have made for better fantasies because you’d have had more real stuff to recall, or whether you’d have been over it once we did it all. No way to tell…but makes for interesting mental exercises.
And then I think about running into you during my wild first year on the Internet…figure out how email and chat worked together and putting them to good use.
And then I think about running into you when I was in London 10 years ago… making good use of the hotel room bed.

I guess I can sum that all up into “I’ve been thinking about you. A lot.”
Damn it…there seems to be no such thing as a short answer.

[We had a brief Facebook chat (which I didn’t keep…argh!) during my lunch hour. He described fucking me bent over my desk.  I explained that I work in an open office with other people, and at that very moment, my boss was sitting on the desk across from me, so if he was fucking me, it would be quite public and while that sounded hot, it might be a tad risky!]
Phil August 30 at 12:10pm
Seeing you talk about fucking me about made me have heart palpitations. Was not sure you used that word. You have been so demure. I was so hoping to hear you say fuck me at some point. Just saw flights to Logan, 78 bucks round trip. I can not wait to be deep inside you.
  
Phil August 30 at 12:21pm
Just read your message. I was never in your bed. Would have loved that. At camp I had my hands down the back of your coveralls. I loved holding your ass. Later we found a quite spot and I got to see, feel and taste your tits. It was on a school bus that I slipped a finger inside of you. You were so wet and smelled and tasted so good. If we had sex back then, I would still have fantasized about you. Would have relived it over and over. Would have thought about that hot ass and how I would have enjoyed that. Would have thought about you sucking me, me eating you. Would have been the same. 
August 30 at 12:47pm
The idea of you thinking about me all these years is wild…that while I was lying in a cold bed, or working my tail off, or watching figure skating in a cold arena, or seeing a play, you were all over the world thinking about me…it’s freaky and hot…it does make me wonder why now? Why did you wait so long to find me…I know, life happens.
And then I have a moment of panic when I think of what might have happened you, in harm’s way on a ship, or a frickin’ car accident in D.C. and I would never have known. And another panic when because something could happen at any moment now and I would never get to see you. Surely fate will not be that unkind. But look both ways before you cross the street, okay?
I am looking at Google maps seeing how long it takes to drive to D.C. and you are looking at flights to Logan. What a pair…
  
Phil August 30 at 1:00pm
I had no real way to contact you. Thinking about it and doing it are different things. I have been married for a long tie, was separated for awhile, now back together for a lot of reasons. Did not prevent my fantasies, did not stop me from thinking it. It’s very enjoyable to speak to a woman with few hang ups, who I feel I can be up front with. I feel like I can say anything to you. I like that.
Phil August 30 at 1:12pm
I’ll look both ways. As I said, not many women in my life and I remember them all. You always had an attitude that turned me on. You were very forward and I liked that a lot. Still do. I also am looking forward to catching up and talking. I’ll enjoy that. The sex will most likely take priority. Look forward to hearing some stories, talking on the phone where you feel comfortable. I can’t wait to hear your voice laying naked on my bed stroking my cock as we talk. Having you hear me when I cum. I want to hear you too. I want to know that your hands are squeezing your tit’s while the other is gently rubbing your clit, imagining that it was my tongue. You owe me a decent picture by the way. Be happy to exchange one for one. What would you like to see?
August 30 at 1:26pm
Are there really still “women with hang ups” at our age? Geesh.
I am around such open people…I forget the rest of the world is not so much. Only get reminded when I got to to the Midwest to visit Hubby’s family. Heh.
The community here is probably what most people would consider wild…whatever characteristic you look at, we have it all…straight, gay, transgendered, poly, BDSM and asexuals; Christian, Jewish, Buddhists, Hindu, mostly non-religious; Burlesque performers and teachers; rich, poor, sane and clincially insane…has taught me a lot.
Do you know any Poly people? There are lot of them here. Would not be surprised if you don’t even know what that is…I didn’t until recently.

August 30 at 1:38pm
A decent picture? I don’t think that’s what you mean…
I can’t fathom sending you a photo. You can’t imagine how tough it was for me to even show off my new glasses. You realize I got my husband to take that photo? There hasn’t been a photo of me that I’ve liked in about 15 years.
I will try to figure it out…but the combination of not having the body and “don’t email anything you don’t want to see on the front page of the paper” is stymying me. I think your imagination is better than anything I could send. I know that’s not fair. I will make it up to you somehow… 😉
Phil August 30 at 1:39pm
Have no idea what Poly is. Have lots of gay friends. Big fan of gay rights. Always felt people should be who and what they are. I don’t think I have many hangups. People should do what makes them happy. The Military forces us into a mold but you see and experience a lot. So what is Poly?

August 30 at 1:40pm
Wait…fingers…inside me…on a school bus? How the heck did that happen? Were there kids all around us? Tell!
Phil August 30 at 1:54pm
Many women/people with hangups at our age. I’ve been to nude beaches, like to be naked in fact. Been a hot tub naked with friends, strait and gay. Never had any issues with people seeing me or touching me. I know so many guys whose wives won’t do this or that. Some have wives who simply hate sex and always did. So yea, lots of hang ups
Phil August 30 at 2:08pm
No problem with a photo. I’ll never push anything. That’s not any fun. I trust you would not post my pics on the front page. I do not remember where we were coming back from. Chorus event, ball game, don’t remember. We were in the back of the bus, me by the window, you kind of leaned back on me. We were kissing and my hand was down the back of your pants. Over the course of the trip, my hand ended up down the front of your pants. You were so wet, my fingers slipped inside easily. You covered it with your arm. There were other kids all around. Was very hot. My dick was pressing into your side. I know you felt it but you would not touch me. You let me touch you any place I wanted. Loved holding your ass in my hands. Running my fingers down your crack….. Wish it had been my tongue.
  
Phil August 30 at 2:10pm
Getting nothing done. Can’t think of anything but fucking you. Gonna go to the gym. Need some kind of physical release.

August 30 at 3:03pm
Why did I go from 120 to 0 on the sex front? Tough to explain without explaining about hubby. I’ve typed a bunch of sentences and deleted them all. It’s complicated. In the same way that you don’t talk about your wife. Can do it, just not a fun topic.
The simple answer is “because he didn’t want me, told me I wasn’t attractive anymore.” Which is true.
Also, as you said, never had the opportunity. No one has offered…no one flirts with me or even looks at me twice. I don’t know what I would have done if a man  had gotten a crush on me. Probably nothing, as I was “church lady” or “head of the office lady.” But I am not at all sure.
But that makes him sound like a cold jerk, which he isn’t. He’s messed up. As in, severe mental illness. Was born that way, according to his mother. And abused as a child by the housekeeper and his old brothers. On lots of pills, doctors, therapists. Can’t work…on disability. Some days he is the creative, funny, talented guy. Other days he is non-functioning lump, sleeping, crying, cutting himself, angry, suicidal…never know which on any given day. He does not direct any of that at me. I know that one day I will come home and he will have killed himself. I’ve kept him from doing it for 16 years and will keep trying, but any given day his brain chemistry may finally fail spectacularly.
He thinks he is bisexual, and polyamorous, but he rarely does anything about it, as his medicines make him impotent.  He has been unfaithful but usually short-lived and sorry.
There…now tell me a little about your spousal situation and we’ll call it even and try to move beyond it. And get back to fun stuff!

Phil August 30 at 4:14pm
I have to say my situation is nothing like that. Wife has always been a very controlling pushy woman. She has few friends and a lot of people simply don’t care for her. As the years went on, she became more ill tempered and often down right nasty. I have a rather care free cavalier attitude that rubs her the wrong way some times. Sex had become unimaginative and routine. I performed when I was expected to. About two years ago, I decided I had enough and no longer wanted to be treated that way. I moved out. Stayed out a little over six months. Lived at the beach and had a blast. Kids talked me into trying again. Back for about 7 months and again, no real changes. This time we talked a lot more. The financial impact of a divorce would have been significant. We get along very well and she does the military wife thing very well. While I was gone, I dated a young lady who was amazing. Later discovered she was not being very honest with me and there were other issues as well. She was very uninhibited, easy to talk to, had that incredible attitude. Wife and I are wonderful friends, we enjoy dinners, wineries etc. I am very active, she is not. I love to party, love music, like to have a good time, her not so much. I am non judgmental, free spirited, she’s very conservative and controlled, no temper here, quick tempered there. I really have no limits sexually, she very conservative. She really does not know what I like, my fantasies, things I’d love to try. The things we have said to each other I would not say to her. Could never tell her I’d like to slip my tongue in your ass or anything even remotely kinkier than that. I never once cheated, just had a very predictable sex life. Guess that’s a hell of a lot better than no sex life. She likes being the officer’s wife. She is good at it. She enjoys the financial perks and being at the top of the military food chain. Not such a big deal to me. Guess that adequately covers that unless you have questions.

August 30 at 4:58pm
Thank you for sharing. I hope I answered your questions, and you can see why I didn’t automatically toss that in between camp and bus and dinner…it is nice to get away from it all for a moment. But it makes sense for you to understand where I am. And for me to know about your situation. May help avoid land mines.
So much of what goes on in one relationship is bouncing off what happened in another…I got the feeling when you asked me certain questions that it was “Wife won’t do this…will you?” Which is fine. Hubby was married before, and I am very different from his first wife, so I am used to the unsaid “well, she never let me” when he asks things.
I shouldn’t scoff about hang-ups, since I can’t manage to send you a photo. You have a great body and happily show it off. I have other talents that I hope to show you in other ways. Don’t hesitate to ask for what you want from me…photos, explanations, or ass-licking. I will do it if I can, or try to tell you why not. I will not think less of you for asking. I have come to believe more and more in honesty and openess. Which may get interesting when it comes down to being unfaithful…
I’m sad that you don’t have the perfect girl for you…and I don’t have a healthy husband who is attracted to me. I hope we can give each other some of what we’re missing on other fronts.
Phil August 30 at 5:33pm
I can honestly say it never occurred to me that wife won’t do this will you. My brain really does not work that way. I just found it very easy to talk about those things with you. Your outlook and attitude are very much more open minded. I do,t feel there is anything I would be inhibited to ask you. That’s a nice change. Being in the military and dealing with female comrades, they tend to be very open, frank and uninhibited. Had many sexual discussions over beers about what women liked and what guys liked. They told me things they did to their guys. Was educational. 

I’m interested in those other talents. What have you done that really turned a guy on? Anything that you considered really out there? I have close friends who are very open. We sit in their hot tub naked and talk about life, politics, sex. I openly admire her body, she openly looks at mine. Other than play footsies in the tub, we never explored anything further, but I learned a lot from her. She is a no taboo person and openly discusses her experiences. My only requirement is that my partner be clean. I shower a couple times a day often more. Morning, before bed and after a workout.

On my way home. Have a bar around the corner that does half price burgers and dollar margaritas on Monday. I like to hang out there and shoot darts, read, use the wi-fi. Gets me out of the apartment which is nice. My room mate teaches high school. He is also a coach. Good guy. That’s where I will be till later. Got facebook there and the game. Looking forward to later. Love to relieve a little tension. I can’t get real specific on a work machine but no issue on mine. Loved hearing fuck, dick, ass today. Gives me a better picture. That’s what I thought and imagined and hoped for. I don’t shock easily and you have said nothing shocking but damn. This is hot!

Poly 101 
Between Phil and You
August 30 at 5:50pm
So. What’s poly?
Very simply, it is the idea that you love more than one person at a time, with everyone aware of what’s going on.

They think monogamy is unnatural – that you can’t get everything you need from one person, and it is great to have more than one person in your life, and multiple people to support a household and raise children.
This is NOT polygamy, where one man is married to multiple women a la the old style Mormons. It is NOT swinging, were you swap partners for a night once a month on alternate Saturdays.
Around us, it means Jane is married to Joe, and they also live with Ken, who is sleeping with both of them and helping to raise Jane & Joe’s daughter Elaine.
Or Sara and Sam live together, and Sam goes out with Mary every Thursday night to see horror movies (which Sara hates) and get laid. Sara may go with Susie, or Steve on Thursdays. Or she may be monogamous. And straight. Or bi.
Or Nell would live with Ted, and 6 times a year, Ted would fly to D.C. to visit his secondary, Louise.
Lots of different models.
There was a great article in the Boston Globe about it awhile back that was  amazingly unsensational.
Terms – your wife is your “primary” and anyone else is a “secondary.”
So if you and your wife lived in a poly world, you could live with her and sleep with her and she could be an officer’s wife. and she would gladly let you fly up to see my now and then, and do all the sexy stuff she is not interested in, and she and I might be friends who help keep you happy. And she might go out with Fred while you’re away. We’d all talk about what she gets and what I get and what you get and figure out ways to split up the schedule and tasks etc.
(Phew…that sounds kind of impossible…but I have friends who’re making it work.)
I think more power to them. But I have enough trouble managing one relationship and feel monogamous myself.

But that was before you found me again and now I don’t know.
Read up and ask if you have questions.
  
Phil August 30 at 5:59pm
Wow, I had no clue. I know people who live like that and it works for them. No one knows except for very trusted friends cause we live in the bible belt and oh my goodness, the talk that would stir. My friends live downtown in a fairly liberal environment. My wife knows them but has no clue. Thinks the other guy just rents a room and they al get along really well. Little does she know. Did not know that kind of relationship had a name though. Would never be my wife’s thing. She freaks about the hot tub. I’m getting an education. I like it.

Bar & Cars 
Between Phil and You
August 30 at 6:10pm
So I am off to dinner at a local bar.  
And then I have to help one of my assistants from work move. This is what happens when you own a mini-van. Everyone calls you when they’re moving! I don’t move anything, just sit there thinking of you while her friends load my car. I wish you could ride along…
And the entire time, I will be thinking about you and not focusing on what I should be doing!
I will think of everything you wrote today…the bus…you coming between my breasts…you pressing me against the wall of the elevator. And more…
I had to giggle as I got into the elevator leaving work today…there is a female voice that says “Going down…” and I was imagining you in the elevator with me, licking me…
I will look for you online when I get home…gotta run.
Phil August 30 at 7:29pm
I have a truck and guess what. Difference is I help move. Big strong back comes in handy. I don”t mind. I’m always willing to lend a hand. 

What is your favorite place that you have visited. I have several. 
[he talks about places all over the world his military travels have taken him]

I love good food, love to cook. I like to entertain. I like people, like to be around people. I also like the quiet and being secluded. I love to read. My Kindle is my favorite toy. I like to exercise, play most sports, do my best to stay fit. I have been accussed of being to easy going, too laid back. I treat people the way I want to be treated. I can be direct when I need to be but not my preference. I’d be very happy in a beach house some place. 

I like art, I love music (all kinds), like movies, prefer theater, love New York (city), like Boston too except for their damn sports teams. 

I have always been monagamous but am not so sure about that any more. I am not looking to leave home, it’s not bad and it would cost me much more than its worth (I think). My life is comfortable. What I lack is passion. I am a passionate person in an unpassionate relationship. Perhaps i can get that else where and it will be ok. I truely don’t know. I was with a girl who saw nothing wrong with her openly flirting with other guys and coming onto another woman but let some one look at me and stand by. Not good. I was open to anything at this point. My experience has been very limited. I am open to your frank appraisal and recommendations. 

You may be the first women I have ever been with who will actually tell me what you want and what feels good. I will do the same. A finger, tongue, anything near my butt drives me crazy. Love it. Not sure why but I just do. I like to reciprocate as well. I like feet, I love tits (what man does not) do not mind the taste of my cum, like the taste of yours (I remember), want to bite, lick, kiss that ass that I held so many years ago. I realize it is not the same shape or size, neither is mine. So much for me is attitude. When a woman feels sexy and her attitude is, I’ll rock your world, that’s awesome. I like it when you also have no aversion to the way you taste and have no issue kissing me after I have gone down on you. I liked the elevator thought. Would love to go down on you in an elevator. Very exciting. 

I don’t know what this is. It’s sexy and it’s fun. It will be very hot. We both need to be able to deal with the aftermath. Will you feel guilty, will you expect more than I can deliver, will I be good enough, will the sex be amazing or dissapointing. I think I can answer that. Think my spelling is going to crap. Having margarittas and a burger. Rather be having you. Like to throw your legs over my shoulders and fuck you hard and fast, then slow and easy, and repeat. I love sex, think every inch of the body is sexy and an errogenous zone.  
Phil August 30 at 8:03pm
Bars are my kind of place. Good bar, good food, simple food. I like it. Probably a dark corner where we could explore each other. Don”t want much more than a glass of wine or a beer to drink. Want all my faculties working. Want to see, smell, feel and taste you completely. I want to cum inside you and on you. 

I am not comparing you to anyone. Could care less what anyone else will or will not do. I care what Sassy wants to do, enjoys doing. If you want to stick a finger up my ass, do it, if you don’t, don’t. If you like a tongue in your ass, great, I love to do that, if not tell me. I don’t need to do anything. This about two people pleasing each other. Its just as important to me to make you feel great and to please you as it is for me to be pleased. I want to hear you moan, gasp, sigh. I want to feel your pussy clench as you cum, watch your tits flush, feel you pull my tongue deeper inside of you. 

I am again so hard thinking about this. My cock is dripping and throbbing. I want to be talking or chatting to you as I stroke my cock, telling you what I’d like to do to do to you and what I’d like you to do to me. I want to cum with you listening. I want to hear you cum. I love knowing that I get you wet. I remember that hot, wet, sweet tasting pussy and I want more. I want to bury my cock deep inside of you and fuck you till we both explode. Can’t wait to feel my cum shoot deep inside of you, your pussy pulsating with your own orgasm, pulling every drop from me. Then we can lick and suck and stroke each other to another. Maybe between your tits, maybe on your ass, maybe in your mouth. Teach me some new cool stuff. I don’t know much. I have a hard cock that never goes down so I can play for a long time. I’m not one of those cum and done guys. I want to taste your tongue in my mouth, taste your lips. I want to suck your nipples into my mouth, gently biting, can’t wit to slip my cock between them. I like toys and I like to watch, all good. Man, I need to cum. Help me cum baby, I can’t wait!

Phil August 30 at 9:50pm
just out of the shower. laying naked in bed watching tv
August 30 at 9:57pm
Home now. Looking for you…


Sexy texts

A Series of Sunday sexy texts
Phil August 29 at 5:34pm
Hey, I like the glasses! 

Looks like your breasts would be amazing with a little lotion between them and a hard cock sliding between them. Not sure what you have done or not done. Would you take me into you mouth given the chance? Would love to feel your mouth slide over my cock, your hair falling to the side. Your hands holding my balls. 

Do you have a favorite sexual position? I’m a fan of missionary, I like the women on top riding me and I also love to be behind. Sitting here very hard, cock in hand, thinking about that. Can’t stop thinking about you stroking me to the point of cumming and then backing off and making it last. I could sit here and get off right now, I have a steady flow of pre-cum for lubrication but not ready yet. Maybe we can chat this week and get off together. I’d love to be stroking my cock, while your fingers were pleasing your wet pussy. That’s a very hot visual for me. Guess I’ll tuck it back in for now and go behave myself. Have a good afternoon Sassy.
Phil August 29 at 6:16pm
Moaning is a good thing. My only expectation when I first contacted you was to say hello and catch up with where life has taken us. It is so nice to hear the sassy girl. You were indeed sexy and sassy and fun. You were direct and not the least afraid to say what you wanted. I remember us being fun and very sexy while still well behaved. 

Life is a short journey, too short to never take any risks. I’m not looking for anything. I have no expectations. We have had a good time being flirtatious and having fun. I’ve had to go to my bunk a couple of times. I’m very excited about the opportunity to meet, have dinner, what ever. If something other than dinner happens, we will both feel that at dinner and dinner won’t take very long. 

I don’t believe in regrets. I have had wonderful experiences in life. Some turned out great, some not so much. I don’t regret anything though. I’d do it all again. What I regret is missed opportunities that I never took advantage of. I have always wondered about you. I have fantasized about you often over the years. More later.
[He texted me two full-length NAKED photos…with a hand covering his genitals]
August 29 at 8:24pm
HIO,,,thisss is the catt. The hooman lady dat feeds meeee wasz gonna write u,. Butt sheez passedddddd outta on the flour after zhe loskdoded at som pix. Bring toona. Kthnx by
Phil August 29 at 8:32pm
Got a betta one 🙂
That’s cute.
[He texted me a photo of him standing sideways with his cock erect]
August 29 at 9:24pm
You are an imp! A very handsome mischievous imp!
There I was, earlier today, standing in the bathroom mirror in a soft old t-shirt with a low neckline where the shoulders slide off, trying to figure out if it’s okay to show off a shoulder and a little cleavage without being burned at the stake as a wanton woman, and you are going full monty on me! Holy cow!
Those photos? I stared and stared…yowza. You are so amazing to look at.
At first, I thought I should say you should leave something for me to discover in person, but what I will say instead is this:
Now turn around and let me see the other side. 🙂
[He texted me a photo of his naked backside]
August 29 at 10:08pm
What would I like us to do? I have no idea right now. Have you done all this sexy stuff and want more? Or are you wishing to try? You don’t have to give details…just want to get some idea.
I am an odd mix right now. Do you want the good news or the bad news?
The bad news is that I’m like that that virgin girl – not shy or inhibited but terrified, with no confidence, not knowing what to do physically. I haven’t done anything for years. YEARS. I mean nothing. So I don’t know what I like anymore or even what is possible. I am not an athlete, never was. And I am wicked rusty and out of practice. Will it be like riding a bicycle, and all come back to me? Hope so. Lots of practice may be required. 🙂
On the good news front, I have lots of fantasies, and read and written erotic fiction, so my mind is very open.
And I had a very wild time as a young adult, and I live in a very liberal community. So I’ve done a lot – not going to write out a list but…I’ve done it. I can tell you stories if you like…but perhaps that’s best left to in person so I can watch your jaw drop and your dick rise. If you want to know now whether I’ve done any particular thing now, I can tell you. If you promise to try not to get weirded out.
Is there anything you could ask me to do that I wouldn’t try?
It boils down to “no threesomes and no lesbians.” And I am a little iffy on anal sex, as I got hurt that way when someone got carried away.  But I would probably trust you to try whatever.
I balk at multiple partners in the same bed. Not because of any philosophical objection, but due to the difficulty of keeping the emotional stuff from getting too complicated, and because I get so excited that I stop being able to think very quickly and can’t keep track of what I am supposed to be doing to whom…sort of the “can’t chew gum and walk at the same time” problem on a grander scale, so I have a hard time holding up my part of the activities.
I’ve had girl crushes and lusted after certain women, but when it gets to a bedroom, my strong hetero side and puritanical upbringing or something takes over and I just can’t do it.
I have this incredible trust in you, and a deep urge to show you how I feel and rock your world. My hope is that sparks will fly and we can tell each other what feels good, what we want and make it happen.
Sorry for another long answer…but communication is a good thing, right?
August 29 at 10:11pm
Had dinner with my folks. They honeymooned at your beach. In 1950. Heh.
August 29 at 10:13pm
I wish I could wolf whistle…you may have the hottest backside I have ever seen. And the shoulders…oh, oh..oh. That last photo caused quite a reaction.
August 29 at 10:14pm
Are you still traveling or home?
Phil August 29 at 10:16pm
Beach
August 29 at 10:23pm
So what are you seeing…if meeting/dinner could go just as you want it…what would happen? This can get a reaction from me now, and perhaps a game plan for later. I’d like to make your dreams come true…

August 29 at 11:57pm
So…talking on the phone. Sometime this week? Or is it too soon? Or maybe you’re not comfortable doing that? Or maybe my number on your cell phone bill could cause trouble…
The possibility of hearing your voice is tantalizing. (And being able to use my hands for something other than typing.)
I will hope for a time when hubby is out. Will ping you on FB chat some evening when the coast is clear? If you’re up for it…

Decide to have fun

A Sunny Sunday serious moment
Between Phil and You
August 29 at 1:17pm
It’s a hot day here in the big city. I hope your day is going well.
I am going to be serious for moment…a rare thing for me.
I am feeling calmer. I seem to have settled the internal debate.
I made good use of my quiet Saturday evening. I read back over what you’ve written to me in the messages and chats. You said some incredibly sweet and wise things. I picked up concepts that I missed the first time around in the heat of the moment. You are a very special man.
I did some reading online about reconnecting with first loves. I don’t usually pay much attention to Oprah, but it’s a topic on one of her forums – she recommended Gabriel Garcia Marques’ book “Love in the Age of Cholera” (which everyone says is not worth reading), but it does focus on the power of first love. Almost everyone in the forum who had been found by their first love, and followed through, said “Don’t do it!” But the way they describe what happened made me know it is worth a try for me. If you still want to.
I do have some risks, but I don’t have small children or a jealous husband or a judgmental community to worry about. I am mostly risking my heart and my sanity. Both of them have been crushed before and bounced back.
And with my dad so close to death, and the death of a friend this summer, in his sleep at age 39, I am focusing on how special each moment in life is…how something can happen to you at any time, so you have to say things now…do things NOW..as there might not be another chance.
And there is the irresistibility of a second chance. They are so very rare. I am so incredibly grateful to you and proud of you for finding me and apologizing and offering to take a chance to see what could happen. And helping me remember that girl and how sassy I can be. And giving me a reason to be sassy. and sexy. You are made of
awesome.
This week has certainly been glorious! and so worth it.
Therefore, I am resolved to stop fretting and enjoy whatever happens – online, on the phone or perhaps in person. Whatever we decide. For a little while or whatever. It will be more than I had before. I still need to be careful and think about each step. But I can do it. Because you have shown me that I can be me, and you will still care.
As Alfred Lord Tennyson said,
“Tis better to have loved and lost
than never to have loved at all.”
August 29 at 1:56pm
This way, I can concentrate on making you moan. Maybe even moan a little myself. 😉

New glasses

Morning coffee 

Between Phil and You
Phil August 28 at 8:01am
Morning.  Just finished up my run. Now I need coffee. Have a great day. 
August 28 at 8:20am
Good morning…another beautiful day here.
So how do you take your coffee?
People around here are always comparing Dunkin Donuts coffee to the new Paul Newman coffee available at McDonald’s, or Starbucks. We have a “K-cup” machine at work…one of the innovations I brought in last year to “perk” people up when we lost half our staff due to budget cuts.
I don’t drink coffee. I don’t do hot beverages, except for tea when I’m sick. I did learn to order a iced chai tea latte at Starbucks when everyone else needs their coffee.
When I went off to college, the first week the wise, old sophomores were talking to us about how to get along in college. They said, “You will learn to drink coffee, stay up all the night, and stop listening to John Denver.” I proved them wrong on all fronts. Hee!
So you can have all the wine and all the coffee. 🙂
Phil August 28 at 9:00am
I take my coffee black. I like Dunkin Donuts or Starbucks. I have a K cup at home and in the office. Love it. Also like John Denver. Many 20 hour days taught me to drink coffee. I’m not a soda person. Prefer water. Sipping a Dunkin cup now in fact. I liked the lobster sushi idea. Sounds like fun!

August 28 at 10:45am
Added bonus
I forgot to thank you for an unexpected bonus our reconnection produced. Thank you very much for reminding me of Classmates. This ended up being a great favor.
This is hard to explain…do you remember Clint? He was in my homeroom, had the locker next to mine, and was always a jerk to me. After graduation, he stalked me, sent me weird letters talking about violent things he wanted to do to me. Part of why it may have been tough for you to find me online. I was poking around Classmates after I read your note, and saw a profile for him, and froze. He hadn’t been there before or anywhere online. I was horrified, thinking that he had found a new way to bother me. Then I clicked and there was a note from his wife saying he died.  I hate to say it, but I was so relieved. I don’t have to look over my shoulder for him anymore! I feel bad for her, but this is a huge worry lifted from me.
So a huge thank you for your part in that. Sorry if that too weird…
  
August 28 at 11:11am
Yeah, I’m not a soda person either. I used to be a big diet Coke fan, but then I had my gall bladder removed…didn’t drink any soda for 10 days and it tasted weird after that.
So no alcohol, coffee or soda. I do drink a V-8 every morning, sometimes order a Virgin Bloody Mary at brunch, but mostly stick to water. What an odd thing to be talking about on a Saturday morning!
August 28 at 12:37pm
I’m off to the mall to get my eyes examined and buy new glasses. I broke the frame while having wild sex online with an old flame that has recently rekindled.  (Not really how they broke, but it sounds more exciting than “a screw fell out in the car, and the frames came apart.”)  Hope all went well today with your family.
August 28 at 4:16pm
Survived my eye exam. My eye doctor is the nicest guy in the world. He asked if I was spending a lot of time on the computer. I said yes, and he asked what for, so I told him “work all day and Facebook all night.” He giggled and I told him my first love had found me last week after 30+ years. He turned beet red. It was so cute. But then he got this cute smile and said, “Good for both of you?” And I said, “Oh yes.” He asked me a bunch of questions about Facebook… obviously not an online guy. I told him he should use it for his business. He was intrigued. Said he wants to learn to tweet. I haven’t messed with that yet.
Back from the mall momentarily…have to go back soon to get the new eyeglasses. They’re PURPLE! I decided my wire frames days are over. You inspired me to try something new.
I despise the mall…hadn’t been there since before Christmas. I am so NOT a shopper!
August 28 at 4:37pm
[He texted me another photo – sitting in an adirondack chair in the sunshine, in a t-shirt and plaid shorts, barefoot, drinking a beer and smiling]

You are going to drive me insane…you know that, right? Of course, as the golf people say, “That’s not a drive, that’s a short putt.”
The photo…You are torturing me! …and it’s wonderful. I was trying to figure out how I could take a photo of myself wearing new glasses and not much else. Just not in my nature somehow…you’ll have to use your imagination.
You send me a perfectly innocent photo, and I immediately start to think about how I could put my hand up those shorts so very easily…oh man, you have gorgeous legs! And that smile again. It makes me smile. And there is something about the arch of your foot…I give up. I am a lunatic!
I don’t think I can explain how odd this is for me…I can go months without noticing there are men around. And suddenly, I am looking at a photo and noticing all these spots on your body…especially where plaid meets plaid…and I just want to jump through the screen and roll you into that grass behind you…laughing, tickling, pressing against you until you blot out the sun above me and make it so I stop thinking…only feeling…damn.
Is there any cure for this?
Back to the mall. Then a Saturday night alone. Hubby is off to help strike a show and the cast party. *sigh* Wish you were here. Or where you could call me…but there will be other times. Patience…patience..
  
August 28 at 8:17pm
[I posted a photo on Facebook of me, with new glasses, outside on my balcony]
Posted a photo for you. No too saucy, but it’s a start. Hope it doesn’t make you run screaming…

TGIF

TGIF


Between Phil and You
August 27 at 7:46am
Good morning! It’s a beautiful summer morning here…just went out on my balcony to feel the sun on my face. I live in a high rise, so I can see out all over. Now I get to take a shower…

Phil August 27 at 8:34am
Good morning! No crystal ball here. No one knows what will happen. The flirtation is fun and harmless. Dinner will be fun. Any other decision will be made then I suspect. I know there is much to consider. I understand that. All those thoughts have run through my mind as well. Sparks, don’t know till we get there. It will be an enjoyable evening no matter what. What happens afterward, I don’t know. I am moving soon.  That will be an adventure.

I remember you dated my brother. Not weird for me. I’ll tell him I heard from you. I’m sure he remembers you fondly. He married a lovely woman, drives a truck and has a gorgeous place up on the mountain in the old home town. He is happy and doing well. Healthy, still very active. We all try to be. We are off to do wine tasting at some of the wineries today. Should be fun.

The Office

Between Phil and You
August 27 at 10:53am
Hiya! I’m back in my office today…trying to do as little as possible. Luckily, there isn’t much to do. 
I work in a big office with 4 desks, so no privacy at all. We have wall-to-ceiling windows on one side, so it’s bright and sunny today. The phone rings, people wander in and out…sort of Grand Central station! But I’ve learned to block it out and focus when I need to.
Today I can’t seem to focus on anything but…YOU! Your smile…your shoulders…your muscled arms…wondering about that first hug…and how you will smell…whether I will remember more then. That happens sometimes – I smell something and it opens up an rush of memory…like a particular kind of humid day it makes me think of London in July…or a certain food smell takes me back to a romantic dinner.
I woke up wondering what kind of car you drive. It doesn’t matter at all…just curious. I am not into cars…didn’t own one until 2003! Public transportation is so good here…didn’t need one very often. When I went to buy my first new car, they asked what I wanted and I said, “A blue one.” Heh. I ended up with a  mini-van. I need to tote lots of people and stuff around. And I like having a big car around me, feels safer. Though parking it in the city can be interesting. And the mileage is terrible.
I’m off to see another play tonight. I don’t get to see other shows very often, but two friends wrote a musical.  So it’s dinner in Boston, then the show. Lots of people I know there – in it and going to see it – including my sister.
Have fun at the wineries! Sounds like a perfect day for you. I can’t drink at all..wicked allergic…so that leaves more wine for you!

Dinner details

Between Phil and You


August 27 at 3:47pm
So what might you wear to dinner?
Would you wear a suit with a tie? or a t-shirt and jeans? …dress pants or sweats…button-down shirt or polo shirt?  I suppose a lot depends on what time of year it is…what you’re doing earlier that day and where we are meeting.  Trying to see you…feel the fabric against my skin when you hug me, feel the muscles of your back with my hands.  Where could I touch flesh while sitting at the table…and what I could help you take off later… buttons…zippers…Of course, just touching somewhere like the inner part of your wrist could be…stimulating. Maybe I will blow on it. Or lick it.
At some moments, I want to meet you at McD’s so it will take about 15 minutes to eat. Or Chinese take-out…chopsticks in bed. Other times, I picture a fancy place nearby where it always takes about 2.5 hours…heh. But they don’t have lobster.  I love trying to think of the perfect place. Though any place will be perfect if you are there.  Even if the food is awful, it may be the best dinner ever. 🙂
Phil August 27 at 4:21pm
I am very casual. Jeans or khakis with a nice shirt, maybe a jacket if the place is nicer. Seafood is my favorite but I like casual places with good food.

Phil August 27 at 6:00pm
Had a blast. Came back with 3 cases of wine. Good time. Allergic huh? Makes you the designated driver. The office sounds nice. No privacy anyway. Glad you are enjoying the photo of me! 
Phil August 27 at 10:31pm
Good nite. Good day. Hope you had a good one as well.
  
Phil August 27 at 10:49pm
A little tipsy and a lot tired. Thinking about dinner. All I really want to taste is your tongue. Better than any lobster.
  
August 27 at 11:14pm
Back from dinner and the play. All good, but spent much time musing on a certain dinner date…Philip a la mode.  Maybe I’ll eat lobster sushi off your tummy…




A Land Mine

A land mine

Between Phil and You
August 27 at 12:58am
Thanks for all your messages tonight…so amazing to have something so special waiting for me to read before bed. My mind is boggling about how great your imagination is…how wonderful you are sharing it…and how frickin hot it makes me! Rawrrrrr….
This is what I call a “land mine.” You step on it without knowing, and it just happens to be a convoluted mess.
The whole debate about what happens or doesn’t after dinner is not about you, but me. I’m airing both sides of what is going on my head. So you know. I am not worried about you forcing me into anything. Your sentence about wanting me to feel sexy and alive was so incredibly sweet.  You are…you do.
I am getting ahead of myself…caught up in the “what ifs” of our first dinner.
– what if it’s wonderful? Great! And then I never see him again and I ache…feel more empty than ever before.
-What if it’s awful? And we’ve ruined a marvelous past and current flirtation? That would suck. But then it could more easily be let go of…tried that, didn’t work, happy to have tried etc. move along…sadder but wiser.
– what if it’s wonderful and we want to see each other again? Do we sneak off to see other now and then, and keep flirting online and…
and what happens if I decide I want to be with you forever…and can’t.
The bottom line is…what do I want? 
What do you want? 
How do I tell what I want? 
How can I resist such a marvelous offer? 
How can I go through with it? 


It is so amazing to be wanted…I had literally given up on the idea of ever having sex again. The ground I built my life on is shaking…and I don’t know whether to hang onto the edge and stay safe, or let go and fall through into the abyss…that might be even better.
I know you don’t know the answers, and we shouldn’t try to figure things out before we know more…and I am certainly not asking for any promises. Geeze…you only friended me a week ago! And of course, it’s complicated by my life that you are only learning little bits about…and I don’t want to ruin a perfectly good thing with reality. I just want you to know why it’s complicated.
And maybe get some hints as to what you are thinking…if you have any clue…what might happen after dinner…after dessert. After breakfast…but if just listening and patting me gently on the head and saying “We’ll see…cross that bridge when we get there…” makes the most sense to you…you are most likely right.
It also likely comes from my wider experiences with men- the fact that I had five online relationships when I first got online in 1993-94. I met four of them. I was lucky…all four guys were exactly who they said they were. They hadn’t pumped up their resume, so to speak, or lied at all. Two of them were really nice guys, just not the guy for me. None of the online spark carried over into real life. Sparks flew with the other two. Had a lovely weekend with one…then never heard from him again. Had a lovely weekend with the other one…and married him. So I have seen the gamut of
– Never met
– met, no chemistry
– chemistry, then dumped
– chemistry, marriage.
Of course, my life is much more complicated now. I’m just trying to figure out which category we’ll end up in, or whether there is something new altogether I haven’t seen.
There is another part of my past that might be where we end up. Have you seen the movie, “Same Time, Next Year” with Alan Alda? It’s about a couple that meet at a hotel once a year, shows 4 or 5 of their interactions over the course of about 40 years. I had a friend like that…someone I saw once a year for six years. We met at an annual convention and got to talking. It was ridiculous…we were completely different in every way. He was 47 and I was 22. He was a die-hard conservative, and I was a rabid liberal. He was married. We had to agree to disagree on just about every topic we discussed. But it was fun to get insights into someone so opposite. The next year he admitted that he was smitten with me. I let things progress, but the sex was awful for me…but I could tell it meant the world to him. So we kept meeting until his reason to be at the annual conventions stopped. I met him one time after that, went to visit him when his wife was away. And he said he had to stop, because all he could think about was me, and he couldn’t live that way. I told him to call me when he needed to hear my voice, and he said that wouldn’t work because he’d be calling me every day. I understood. It was a relief for me. Probably would not have been true if the sex had been any good. I get an annual Christmas card so I know he is still alive…
And this doesn’t even touch on all the issues inside my marriage…which is good in a lot of ways but obviously out of whack. Definitely best left for later.
Wow…that got way too long. Didn’t mean to dump all this on you. Not sure I should send it…but I think you can deal with it.
I don’t need to know now…just know that I am thinking about it. Trying to explain. And it is mostly not about you. And I will try not to let it interfere with the delightful, delicious, delovely dinner ideas…
I will go to bed now…think about buying a skirt to wear…and maybe some sexy underthings that you can rip.