Keep 300 feet back

Sunday, April 21, 2013

I had a meltdown this morning. I feel like a firetruck with a big sign on my butt that says “Danger – Keep 300 ft back.”  Sigh.

With all the craziness this week around the Marathon and the Lockdown, I felt the need to reaffirm that I am alive!  I wanted to talk with a nice man.

1) I decided to try AM chat last night.

I haven’t done it before but I was home alone and bored. I got pinged by a local guy.  He was so easy to talk with!  I felt a great connection.

Maybe you can tell me why a guy would talk to me for two hours, tell me he wants to meet for lunch, tell me he will call in 15 minutes to settle the details and then…NOT CALL?! No call, no email, no message on AM.  When did the lie start?

2)  Mr Truck said we could talk

I’ve been emailing with Mr Truck for 6 months. We have fun sharing p0rn. He tells me when his wife is away and that we should meet, but it never happens. So this time I asked if he could call me. He has a great voice and speaks very well in a sexy way. Oh, great idea, he says. He is a morning person, so he picks 8 am today. So I get up early, get myself all psyched up and… NOTHING.

So I sit at my computer crying, wondering what is wrong with me that two guys in 12 hours can’t be bothered to call me at a time they chose?  I ask for so little and I can’t even get that?

Another chatter had the misfortune to wish me a good morning on IM about 11 am and I whined all over him, poor man.  But that seemed to help.

I need to lower my expectations a lot… and not saddle these men with my need for a special man when all they want is a little chit chat now and then.

Mr. Truck emailed me eventually – so sorry, has the flu, fell asleep on the couch about midnight and missed his alarm. Whatever.

Mr. Hyatt is asking when he can see me. I feel stupid not to do it… but I just don’t care. I should give him a second chance, I suppose. But he doesn’t listen to me… and sends me the oddest videos.  I dunno.

I want to dump them all and focus on Philip. He thinks he can get here to see me again… which makes me sooo happy! But I know I mustn’t give up all my local options just because he might appear for a couple of days.

It was fascinating which of the AM men checked on me on Friday when all hell was breaking lose in my backyard. Two guys – Panties Man and Schenectady Sam, a guy who somehow ended up on my chat list and we’ve talked like… four times. So… marginal guys. Am I wrong to think that if the AM men can’t be bothered to contact me when it seems like the world is coming to an end, I can assume they really don’t care at all?  Not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does.

Wow… that was wicked cranky sounding! Sorry.  I need some time off from AM or some sort of miracle. This week is nutty at work with a big event, so perhaps I’ll just sit back and not think about AM.

You would think

Monday, April 15, 2013

So there was a thing in Boston today.   A VERY BAD thing.  And it was all over the news.  All over the world.  Late afternoon, I started hearing from friends and family and project people and co-workers and bloggers and blog fans and chatters and Philip and…

You would think I would hear from the AM men I am corresponding with regularly.  Mr Truck?  Panties Man?  Mr Hyatt?  Maybe the Traveler who had just been here?  Maybe they’d inquire as to how I am?  Was I there?  Am I close to the area?  Tell me how they got along today with so many roads and services disrupted?  I thought they’d check in.


The only man I heard from was Schenectady Sam, the guy over 100 miles away who had helped me try to unravel and AM Mystery in late March, that I hadn’t talked with much at all.

Not a word from any of the others.  Zip.  Nada.  Zero.  They were the only subset of my social circles that were silent.  Why do you think that is?

IM Apr 15 4:27 PM
• Apr 15 4:27 PM Sam: are you OK?????
IM Apr 15 9:38 PM
• Apr 15 9:38 PM Sassy: Yes. I am fine. Thanks for checking on me!
• Apr 15 9:38 PM Sassy: Scary shit Sam. 
From: Sassy
To: Sam
Sent: Monday, Apr 15, 2013 9:46 PM 
Subject: Checking in 
Hiya!  Since IM is being so freaky, I am switching to email.  
Thank you very much for checking on me!  It’s been a long strange afternoon, but I am fine, and as far as I can tell, all my pals are safe too.  Several of them were right there, but got lucky. 
Here’s a fun video of a man hard at work, to keep us smiling.  This is NSFW!
To: Sassy
From: Sam
Sent: Tues, Apr 16, 2013 9:10 AM
Subject: Re: Checking in
What a thing.  I watched it all unfold on the camera feed from WBZ.  I’m glad to hear that you and yours are safe, but man … it just makes you shake, doesn’t it?
Thanks for the video.  🙂  I watched it this morning BEFORE I drove in to work.  And now that I’m here, I’m …
From: Sassy
To: Sam
Sent: Tues, Apr 16, 2013 11:42 AM
Subject: Re: Checking in
Good morning!  
I flipped back and forth between the Boston Globe tweeter feed and CBS live feed… so bizarre.  How can this happen in my city?  On this day?  Then my phone, email, IMs and Facebook went wild with people checking on me.  It is lovely to be cared for!  
We are trying to focus on the good done by hundreds of people rather then the evil done by a few.  I do feel the need to reconfirm that I am alive, say things to people I care about.  Never forget that you are a special man and there is a sassy woman in Boston who thinks so!  and wishes she could kneel at your feet and have a blissful look on her face while she pleasures you slowly and carefully with her hands and mouth for 5 minutes!  Have a great Tuesday! 
From: Sam
To: Sassy
Sent: Tues, Apr 16, 2013 2:18 PM 
Subject: Re: Checking in
well that idea just made me totally melt …

An AM Mystery

Something odd happened this lazy Sunday afternoon.  It’s been very quiet – no messages in awhile from Ashley Madison, the online dating site for “married but looking folks.” I don’t go there to check unless someone writes to me, or I am helping my pals fine-tune their profiles.  If I don’t log on, I don’t get any attention.  Mr Truck said he would call but… surprise surprise… he didn’t.  And Mr Hyatt is still out of town.  
Suddenly I get winks from men in Schenectady, Montreal, Scranton and Austin, Texas!  All in one day!  It makes Schenectady seem downright close, especially since I know my way around that area.  I couldn’t figure out why I was being noticed by men from away.  I had never received a wink from anyone further away than the edges of NH and RI near Boston.  
I’ve definitely noticed upticks in contacts at various times… New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, and I hear that the day after Mother’s Day is AM’s biggest day for new sign-ups.   People probably have high expectations for these days of obligation in relationships, and when they are disappointed it can be the last straw that sends them online and into the arms of someone else!  
I asked my online friends who I know use AM if they’d noticed something similar, but no one did.  Was it just the coming of spring making men frisky far and wide?  Or some change AM had made?  I had not changed my settings.  These were not traveling men… just interested in chatting.  Had I shown up on some ad or mailing from AM?  An AM mystery! 
So I decided to send a message to the guy from upstate New York, see if he could shed any light on the new contacts.  He was very pleasant, said he was new on AM and had tried out the chat feature and I was on a list of women online and ready to chat!  
This puzzled me… I was not logged in to AM and when I am do not chat on AM!  I have that feature turned off because I kept getting fascinating offers like, “Yo!  BaBee!  U wanna chat?”  Gosh… how could I resist that?  I managed.  No… just… no.  
So it remained a mystery.  I did have a lovely series of emails and some very hot chats with the guy in Schenectady.  Amazingly – he was not a Yankees fan!  I got to poke around in the head of a long-suffering Mets fan.  I helped him learn the ropes on AM, and he told me funny stories about his initial attempts to attract the attention of the married ladies looking for more in upstate NY.  
He eventually said he’s a submissive, and wants to lick my shiny leather boots.  Hmmm… you guessed it.  I don’t own any sexy boots!  I helped him put code words into his profile to make that clearer to the dominant ladies.  He said it worked like magic and he disappeared into the arms of a domme.  Happy licking, sweet Schenectady man!