Category Archives: AM

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Meeting the Professor

Thursday, November 29, 2012

A chaste hour

Richard Branson
I escaped work for a blissful hour today to eat lunch with “The Professor.”  After emailing for two months and a couple of mundane phone calls, he surprised me yesterday with an offer for lunch today.

Lunch is a good offer!  It means he is willing to spend more than the time it takes me to drink an iced chai latte, and pay for food!

For those who like stats – The Professor was the second man to contact me on Ashley Madison, back on September 21.   He is the fifth man I’ve met:

  1. The Lawyer      has disappeared
  2. Dancing Man     once and done
  3. Panties Man      still chatting and showing off beautiful panties 
  4. Speedy             once and done
  5. The Professor

We met at a restaurant.  For the first time since the end of September when I got plantar fasciitis, I walked somewhere!  I was okay walking over and back, then could not walk the rest of the day without agony.  Ah well.  It feels like I am allotted a certain number of steps per day, say, 200? After that?  OUCH.  

He was sitting at the bar grading blue books when I found him.  I adore it when the man is already there.  He looks like his photos!  Yay!  And he does have the biggest briefcase I’ve ever seen!  He stood and shook my hand.  I told him I’d go get a table while he packed up.  We had a quiet corner.  I sat at a 90-degree angle from him so we’d be closer together.  Maybe he’d take my hand?  Or play under the table?  I need touch so desperately!

We ordered lunch and talked. He talked about the online women he has met… not sure if that’s a good sign or not.  He told me enough to google a couple of them which concerned me but I have not told him that much.  He pushed me to tell him my name and where I work.  I didn’t.  He made me laugh.  He laughed at a couple of my stories.  It felt comfortable.

He did not touch me.  He paid for lunch.  I walked him to the subway and got a chaste hug I solicited at our parting.

At that moment, I had no clue if he would ask for more.  I did not have the urge to grab him, but he was not repulsive.  If he pursues me, fine, if not fine.  I waited a little while to see if he’d write, then wrote him a two-sentence thank you note for lunch.  

He wrote back late that evening… kvetching about being stuck on the subway on his way home due to an accident, hoping the rest of my day went better than his.  I wrote right back… no response.  I wrote again a week later when I came across a funny “grading bingo card.”
Never heard another word.  Even though I had told him that I hate the silence… that a “thanks but no thanks, best of luck” would be fine and he’d agreed.  Ugh ugh ugh.  I shouldn’t let it shake my self confidence, but it does.  
I miss our daily emails and the phone calls.  He was a challenge to communicate with but I felt like last week around Thanksgiving he finally got it that I am a nice person, just wanted to make him smile.  It makes me sad that did not even rate a farewell.  It makes me very leery to meet a man if it means I am cut off from him completely.  Ugh.  If he doesn’t feel the connection, I suppose it’s just as well, even if it feels completely uncivil.   It seems to be the way it is with AM men.  I don’t like it.  Ah well.

Onward and upward!

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Setting up lunch

From: Scot
Monday Nov 26, 2012 11:37 pm
To: Sassy
Re: Thanksgiving 
Hey, S,
Yes, I know, it sounds positively inhuman, but I’m HAPPY to be back at work and AWAY FROM MY FAMILY.  This last week was a LITTLE TOO MUCH FAMILY “TOGETHERNESS.”  Don’t get me wrong: I love my parents, siblings, nephews, etc., but I’ve got a limited tolerance for their manifold idiosyncrasies.  
For example, I’m glad I don’t have to hear my near-senile father berate yet another innocent waiter about the frankly invisible defects in his balsamic-free, tomato-free, lactose-free, gluten-free, wheat-free, everything-else-that-makes-his-“system”-malfunction-free granola-and-vegetable-yougurt-concoction.  Let him go back to NYC and be a curmudgeon there.  I’m DONE.
Anyway, so much for that.  On to more important matters.  When do I get to finally meet you in person?
–Scot
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From: Sassy
Tuesday, Nov 27, 2012 12:21 am
To: Scot
Re: Meeting
Hiya Scot,
Meet?  When you ask me?  🙂
Hmmm… ages ago we said tomorrow.  But you’d rather not trudge around in the snow, I bet.  I don’t want you falling for me that way!  Let me know what works for you.  I am usually open any day but Wednesday at lunch. And any late afternoon.  
I dunno… it’s only been two months.  Are you sure?  🙂
-S
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From: Scot
Tuesday, Nov 27, 2012 12:34 am
To: Sassy
Re: Meeting
Do you want to meet this Thursday for lunch or a late afternoon snack/drink?  I’d really like that.  It’s no problem for me to cancel my office hours.
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From: Sassy
Wednesday, Nov 28, 2012 8:03 am 
To: Scot
Re: Meeting
Hiya Scot, 
Tomorrow sounds great!  I hate to rob your students of your excellent counsel, but do rather want to see your smiling face.  Does the 12:30 pm plan make sense for this time or did you want something different?  I could also get out about 4 pm if that works better.  Let me know.  
Thank you!
-Sassy
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From: Scot
Wednesday, Nov 28, 2012 10:24 am
To: Sassy
Re: Meeting
Dear S,
A 12:30 meeting would be terrific, but could you run the logistics of getting to that particular site past me again?
Best,
Scot
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From: Sassy
Nov 28, 2012 2:32 pm 
To: Scot
Re: Lunch details
Hiya Scot, 
I hope your Wednesday is going well.  I’m having another nutty day at work, but smiling at the thought of having a good reason to escape for an hour tomorrow to see you!  Here are the details of the lunch plan.  It may be a sunny day, if the forecaster are to be believed.  
Thanks again for agreeing to travel over here!   I picked a restaurant near the T exit 
[directions redacted]
They have great food.  
If your plans change, please let me know at [Sassy’s Google Voice #].  I am not a flake… I will be there at 12:30 pm or call you, unless I get squished under the Mass Ave bus.  It looks like it will be cold, so wait inside.  They usually won’t seat people until everyone is there, so go to the bar and I will find you.  Likewise, if I get there first, I will head to the bar.  I’ll be the one in blue with a lighter silk scarf.  
I know these meets can be nerve-wracking.  If there is anything that will make it easier, don’t hesitate to say.  This should be fun!  I am very excited to fill in more pieces of the Scot puzzle!  
-Sassy
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From: Scot 
Nov 28, 2012 10:22 pm 
To: Sassy
Re: Lunch details
Hey S,
GREAT.  Looking forward to it.  I’ll see you at 12:30 tomorrow.
Remember, I have a BIG briefcase.  That’s because I live on the T, and I sometimes need to carry a lot of student papers around.  Tomorrow, it will be full of sub-literate essays submitted by the students in my class.  Also, my hair is a bit longer than in my AM profile.  Look for the tall guy with the beard and the blond ‘fro.
Best,

Scot
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Professor’s holiday

From: Scot 
To: Sassy 
Sent: Sunday, November 25, 2012 12:48 AM
Subject: Thanksgiving
Hey S,
Just a quick note before I crash.  I’m exhausted.
This has been a FUN Thanksgiving, even though the lack of sleep is getting to me.  Apart from having to line-edit a bunch of sub-literate essays, I’ve inherited the task of entertaining my five-year-old niece, whose parents are relieved to have me take her off their hands for six or eight hours every day.  Don’t get me wrong: I love the job.  She’s the cutest little girl in the history of the world, but, whoa, is she a terror!  It takes all of my ingenuity to keep her from destroying the house.  
Still, I’ve loved rediscovering the books I used to read to my daughters when they were little.  I even find myself remembering the particular cadence with which I used to read certain sections so as to produce the optimum five-year-old response.  And it still works.  Yay.  Everybody else in the house is busy with cocktail parties and chitchat.  I get to play with her.  Lucky me.
Anyway, I’m wiped out right now.  Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  Talk to you soon.

–Scot
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From: Sassy
Nov 26, 2012 2:58 pm 
To: Scot
Subject: Re: Thanksgiving
Hiya Scot,
I am dashing between meetings but thinking of you.  So glad that your holiday turned out better than you had thought!  My niece put on a concert on Thanksgiving, playing two songs with both hands!  
Hope you’re having a good day back at work. 
-S
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SmoothGuy Smooth Start

There’s this thing on Ashley Madison where a guy “favorites” you.  He adds you to his list of favorites, and he can turn on notifications so every time a woman logs on, AM emails him.  AM emails the lady to tell her he has done that.  It’s a free way to bring yourself to the attention of a lady. I find it rather creepy, but it does get me to look at the profile.

So SmoothGuy favorited me.  I went to look at his profile and… WOW!  The man can write!  I’ve never seen anything like it.  He told a story of his first date, the song that way playing, the atmosphere.  Very romantic.  Then he described his perfect partner.  And what he is like.  It spoke to me.  He seemed very smooth but earnest in a very approachable way.  No typos!  Perfect punctuation!

He lives about 30 minutes away in a nice suburb, if he’s telling the truth.  47… probably means around 50… fine.  5’10’, 210 pounds. Taller than me, not so skinny… nice.  Looking for “Anything Goes.”  Okay.  Attached.  Good.  Never smoked.  Nice.

So I “winked” at him to see if he’d write back, spend a little money on a message.  Was I worth that?

Yes!
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Date:  Nov 25th – 1:15pm
From:  SmoothGuy
To: Sassy
Message:

Hi there! Love your profile. Also think we are looking for very similar things. Plus don’t know what I like best – the blue eyes, great smile, sultry voice or great attitude! Probably the attitude, but I’m a sucker for a sultry voice :-). Hope to hear back.
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I did not keep him waiting.  I dashed off a quick reply, hoping to catch him while he was still online.
Date:  Nov 25th – 1:28pm
From:  Sassy
To: SmoothGuy
Message:
Hiya! Thanks for writing! You are making me smile. It is scary how much your words resonate with me. I didn’t think it was possible. Most guys get stuck on the word “busty” so I appreciate your reading the rest of that sentence. 🙂 I don’t want you to line AM’s pockets, so let’s switch to email? You can find me at the same user name on Yahoo if you want to explore further. -Sassy
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He was a fast worker.  He pinged me on Yahoo IM 4 minutes later! 
1:32 pm Hi
and he sent a test message to my Yahoo email 4 minutes after that – very smart. 
From: SmoothGuy
Nov 25, 2012 1:36 pm 
To: Sassy’s Yahoo email
Hi there again!
I got your message back and am sending you this to make sure I got the correct address. Also sent an invite on yahoo messanger – don’t know if you use that or not.
Anyway, thanks for sending your nice note back! Let me know if you get this please.
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From: Sassy
Nov 25, 2012 1:56 pm
To: SmoothGuy
Hiya!  Smooth?  SG?  Honey?  Sweetie Pie?  Sugar Lips?  
I am happy to report that your message did not go to some biker chick in Peoria.  You have passed the “able to type an email address” test!  Good man.  You would not believe that several men who made it onto AM can’t manage to do this.  So you are ahead of the pack already.  
I’ll go accept your invitation to chat… so think about what you want to ask me.  What will tell you if I am a possibility?  Heinz or Hunts ketchup?  So tough to know what matters… but let’s try to figure it out! 
-Sassy
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We started IMing at 1:57 pm and rolled along for over an hour until his family got home from the movies and he had to go.  We talked about our AM experiences.  He’s met three women since April – one great experience but she separated from her husband and wanted to date single men, one who didn’t click in person and one who had “too many boyfriends.”  
He seems so nice, and real.  
Wow!  What a smooth start! 
by

One Finger, Lots of Periods

From: Sassy
Sat Nov 24 10:27:54 2012
To: RobsterMan@aol.com
Hiya Handsome, 
You are full of pep and good ideas this morning!  Be yourself.  You can do that.  It’s safe here to be sexy and silly and smart. 
It’s delicious to think about you kneeling between my legs, exploring with your fingers and your tongue, figuring out what will make me squirm and scream and shake.  Or worshipping my chest… sucking, biting, twisting until I moan.  I fought breast cancer last year and WON!  So I am proud of “the sisters” and want them to get the attention they deserve.  Maybe grab some lube and make a tunnel between my breasts, slide and glide… getting licked when you appear at the top?  
Doggie is delightful… so deep, so powerful.  But I can’t see you or touch you much… so I want you to flip me over, pull my heels onto your shoulders and let me see your face when you are balls deep and exploding.  If you pay attention to making me cum, it will return to you 1000x in pleasure.  
Only time will tell if I can deep throat you, but with my hands and mouth…. I can send you soaring.  Take you to the edge over and over… let it build.  You think you can’t hold back for one more second, but you do.  And it gets better.  And better.  Until you lose your mind in the best possible way, your eyes roll back in your head and you can only feel the wet, hot, tight spot closing around you.  Sound like something that might interest you? 
How long have you been married?  16 years for me.
Tell me why you’re on AM?  I get nothing at home so I am looking for something.  Due to my physical starvation, the basics sound very hot to me – a long, fierce kiss, a back rub, an ear nibble… and all the sexier stuff seems wild and wonderful.  
Want to say what you do for work?  I’m an office manager at a big place. 
Do you have pets?  I have two cats.  They belong to Hubby but allow me to pet them sometimes.  
Do you have children?  Any still at home?  None here. 
Were you raised in MA?  I’m from upstate NY, came here for college and never left. 
Any fiction in your profile?  Most people do to protect themselves.  
That’s probably enough of me being nosy for today.  
I will think about seeing you.  But it is tough to believe that it can be better than your words in email or on the phone.  Tell me a story about what that might be like in private?  Where? What would happen if you were in charge?  Let me see inside your head… 
-Sassy
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From: RobsterMan@aol.com 
Sun Nov 25 08:22:15 2012
To: Sassy
……….Sassy…………..how are you?  I love your e-mails but I am a one finger typist and it takes me forever to send you a note,,,,,,,,so what do you think about exchanging cell phone #…..mine is private to only me…..it would be easier for me…………..I have been married for 30 yrs……….2 sons not at home…….2 cats ,…….I grew up in Ma  ,college in Ma…..I teach at a local community college……..no fiction in my profile…….I am in AM to find a good friend [with benefits] that I can share part of my life with and I assume the same for you [correct me if I’m wrong]……..my home sex life is zero ,so I’m looking……………………………………..love to see you in private,I ‘ll find a nice spot and it may very well be the night of your life …….I’ll take charge and undress you,slowly,kissing and licking each part of your body . I will get you so wet ,it will be running down your legs……..you will be teased until you can’t stand it …you will be begging and I’ll decide when and what to do  !!!!!!!!   this is getting me hot !………………..Why are you THINKING about seeing me?….let’s make it happen —-soon…..Don’t you think you can decide if you want to be with me by seeing and speaking in person ?……….any how, let me know what you’re thinking………best ……..Rob
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More periods

Here’s more in the conversation with “The Pest” aka “The Man with too many periods.”  If you missed the first part go here.

Asking him #1’s questions slowed him down a bit, thank goodness.  I can only take so many periods in a day!  It took him two days to answer this time.  He did make the switch to my Yahoo email!  

Fri Nov 23 12:01:56 2012
From: RobsterMan@aol.com
To: Sassy’s Yahoo address
…..Sassy……..to answer your questions…..First let me tell you ,I love big women and also those with an edge ..like you………….I don’t want to make love to a pretzel stick with a dress on !!!…….Ques #1..looking for someone that really wants to be made to feel like a real woman,has great stamina,loves to try many positions etc……..Ques#2….rock and roll………Ques#3…great butt and big puppies ….Ques#4..pub……Ques#5…Tina Turner……..Ques#6…..15 yrs old…………Now for the good stuff…..I will saturate you with foreplay until you beg me to make love to you ………I will tease you ,inch by inch,a little in ,a little out,etc………….I have been told that I have great equipment and know how to use it . A quote from a lady ‘you are blessed with what you have’……..my pleasure is to please women and would enjoy getting to really ‘know you’……..my e-mail is [redacted]@aol.com………….Hope to hear from you……..Best………Rob
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Never seen breasts called puppies before.  He meant tits, right?

He didn’t tell me any stories.  Those questions are supposed to give a guy a chance to tell me stories.  Ah, well.  

I did adore this part “I love big women and also those with an edge ..like you………….I don’t want to make love to a pretzel stick with a dress on !!!”
Oh my… an AOL email address?  Really?  I haven’t seen one of those since… I don’t know when!
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To: RobsterMan@aol.com
From: Sassy
Fri Nov 23 13:03:31 2012

Well, well… hello to you, Rob!  Thanks for switching to email.  Though I haven’t seen an aol address in a long time… wow.  I see you survived Thanksgiving and are back to your frisky self today.  I appreciate you playing along to answer the questions – very interesting!  Here are my sassy answers and some comments on yours.  [redacted – find them under emails to #1 here]
Any questions you want to ask me?  Be bold.

-S
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RobsterMan@aol.com
Sat Nov 24 09:37:05 2012
To: Sassy’s Yahoo address
……Sassy…………..I’M not sure how bold you want me to be in an e-mail ,but here goes and if I overstep ,please let me know and I will apologize…………Qoestions for you………which do you prefer,pussy eating,tit sucking,positions for fucking?……..I like all of these ,especially doggy style…..        I really want to lick you all over and make you cum many,many  times……….these e-mails are good but I want to see you ….over a coffee or whatever…..we should make plans to have our own special Xmas …private  !!!!……Are you ready for this? I am but can wait if you’re not ………….PS….I’ll bet you can’t take me all the way in your mouth ……………….love to hear your thoughts on this stuff…………Best ………Rob
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I don’t know about you, but I find it almost impossible to read these messages and take them seriously. But he is so earnest.  I will give him another chance and keep writing.

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Sentimental soul

To: Scot
From: Sassy
Mon, Nov 19, 2012 at 7:57 PM
Subject: Holiday prep
Hiya Scot, 
Did your week get off to a good start?  Hope so! 
Awww… glad you liked my humble words.  What did I say that was so great… tips to make the holiday a little less stressful?  I hope it works!  It makes me so happy to help. Someone should benefit from all my years of tweaking the family into shape.   I was in a discussion years ago about what my “shirt” says, i.e. what people think when they meet me.  Someone said, “Talk to me and I will make it better.”  And everyone nodded!  So even if you can’t see “my shirt” I think you’ve figured it out anyway.  
I was meeting with my boss from 4-4:30 pm and wishing I was talking to you instead.  I don’t know what topic we would have landed on, but it would have to be better than my project list.  
Are you finding the students are taking off already?  About a third of my co-workers are already gone.  Two are staying to the bitter end, going home Wednesday afternoon or not at all, so I won’t be unassisted.  Bad things happen when I have to answer the office phones. 
Thank you for giving me something good to think about when my life is a little chaotic.  I won’t say your name aloud at dinner Thursday when my sister asks what we are thankful for, but know that you are on my mind.  
I dare you to count the items that pass through your hands in the soapy water… my sister is having 18 people and making too many dishes with pots and pans and utensils.  I will have you beat on the washing front for sure!  Hmmm… wonder what I should bet? 
Oof… that was way too serious!  I’d better wink at you and flash my chest as I dash away.  Hugs!
-Sassy 
===========
From: Scot
To: Sassy
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2012 11:54 PM
Re: Holiday prep
Hey, S,
Actually, yes, the week did get off to a good start–although, as you suspected, a hefty percentage of my students have already left for Thanksgiving break.
As to what was so “great” about your e-mail–I honestly don’t know, except that it just came across as genuine, a message from someone who didn’t have a hidden agenda or a score to settle.  Sad to say, at this point in my life, and in my line of work, I don’t get too many communications like that.  So I’m appreciative when I do receive them.
In any event, I gave a stunning lecture today!  To judge by the glazed expressions on the faces of my students, I didn’t set many pulses racing.  Oh, well.
Look forward to speaking with you–and, hopefully, MEETING you–soon.
–Scot
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To: Scot
Tue, Nov 20, 2012 at 8:13 PM
From: Sassy 
Re: Holiday prep
Hiya Handsome.  
Did you finish work with a flair?  I had a wild day but hope tomorrow will be better.  
Does anyone ever tell you that you look like Richard Branson?  He’s quite good-looking! 
Geesh… you are such a cynic!  Are you a tough world-weary curmudgeon or a sweet dog someone has kicked too often?  Never mind… it doesn’t matter.  I like both parts.  
Ah – you have discovered my terminal flaw.  I am nice.  My agenda is hardly hidden.  I want to make you happy, and get some passion in return.  That’s it!  
Don’t let the family get you down!  Pop in hear and I will try to make you smile.  
-S
============
From: Scot
Wednesday, Nov 21, 2012
To: Sassy
Re: Holiday prep
Hey S,
Well, the house is PACKED with relatives, but one of them is my lethally cute five-year-old niece, so I’m happy.  I’ve actually been able to get some work done, too, which is good.
No, actually, I’m not a cynic.  Far from it.  My daughters kid me about how sentimental I am, and how I always seemed to cry when I read to them when they were younger.  Oh, well.
Hope your holiday is going swimmingly, and I look forward to seeing you soon.
–Scot
by

The Man With Lots of Periods

I got a message from another AM guy!

=================

Date:  Nov 18th – 1:41pm
From:  Rob
Message:

Hi……..read your profile……….liked it ………I am smart and funny…..I teach at a college ,am in great shape , love to please women…’real women’…..would love to chat with you and see what happens…………….hope to hear from you…………best ………….Rob
==========

Well well… another professor.  But what an odd format.  Maybe there was a sale on periods?  And spaces before commas.  And single quotes?  Yikes.  
I popped onto AM to check out his profile.  Let’s see… Hmmm… 5’10” and 160 pounds.  Another shorter, skinny guy.  I’m off those for now after Speedy.  Not fair to let him ruin it for all guys of his stature, but…. I need a break.
He clicked a bunch of check boxes.  Nothing scary but zzzzz.  His writing has that same explosion of periods.  Strange.  Here’s a fun line “I love a woman who smells delicious.”  Okay.  Not thrilling me.  I may be shallow to want a man who know how to punctuate, but I’m taking a pass. 
Three days later – he wrote again!  
Date:  Nov 21st – 1:20pm
From:  Rob
Message:
Hey Miss Sassy ……….it’s Rob ,again ,with my second ‘shout out’ to you …………let’s talk …….what harm would that do?………I would like to hear from you ……all the best ……………
===============
What?  This was my first experience with a guy writing twice.  That is so…not done!  It’s in the AM FAQ.  Don’t pester a lady who does not reply!  He spent money twice?  Hunh.  I decided to write back and say thanks but no thanks.  So here goes with my first rejection letter:
To: Rob on AM
Date:  Nov 21st – 3:31pm
From:  Sassy
Message:
Hiya Rob. My goodness! Thank you! Two messages… during a holiday week, no less! It is lovely that you are writing when everyone else is busy with family. What on earth in the profile of curvy lady or your life that would inspire that?! 
You have a great profile, but I wasn’t going to waste your time. Feel free to give me your rationale if you don’t agree. Here’s my logic. I aim to make a man happy and I don’t think I can do it for you because: 
1. I can rock your world online or on the phone, but I am a BIG gal. I don’t pay much attention to stats, but I find that men under 6 feet/ 230 pounds aren’t happy when they see me. There is such a social stigma to being with a woman about the same height and bigger… even if no one sees me but you, it is tough to fight it. It’s sad that a bright, funny, sexy woman with a gorgeous smile, blue eyes, sultry voice can’t have that offset her size but that seems to be the way of the world and the visual nature of men. 
2. I worry that I’d squish you! 
3. You picked “anything goes” and I appreciate your honesty, but I don’t want to look for someone again in a short time. 
4. Your brothers-in-cheating have muddied the waters. I’ve had bad meets, so I am shy right now. It might take me awhile to meet and you probably want someone to suck on you next week. Oops… that may have been a little too blunt. Ah, well. 
5. I smell bad. Just kidding! That’s sassy me! But I’m not into perfumes… 
You deserve the woman of your dreams! And from what you wrote, it’s not me. But I do have natural breasts! I am a boob man’s bliss. And I don’t mind chatting if you want a buddy. Give me your email or yahoo chat ID if you want off of here. Not productive if you’re looking for sex soon. But as you say, it can’t hurt. If not, Best of luck! Happy Thanksgiving! -Sassy
==============
Of course, he wrote right back. 
Date:  Nov 21st – 8:36pm
From:  Rob
Message:
Sassy……..it is a busy time but you must see how interested I am in getting to know you…….this was the fastest rejection I have ever received…..WOW………I really love ‘big’ women and I know I CAN ‘HANDLE’ you….you can be shy and we can take some time…….so don’t write me off so fast.I also don’t chase a thousand different women…..let me make you happy …..it can happen …..I’m in great physical shape ,take care of myself and know we can hit it off…….why not give me a chance ,we only live once ……..let’s meet for coffee soon and see what we think………I’m a good guy looking for someone to make happy…..I KNOW you will like me if we can speak in person and go slow,if that’s what you want……..don’t throw me away so fast …….have a great holiday ……I look forward to hearing from you …….soon……….best ……..Rob
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Hmmm… okay.  I’ll explore a little further.  Let’s see what he does with #1’s famous questions. 
To: Rob on AM
Date: Nov 21, 2012
From: Sassy
Hiya Rob,
Why are you so interested?  What did you see in my profile?  I know…I’m female, but besides that? 
My goodness, what a salesman you are!  It was not a rejection… just trying to tell it like it is.  Keep you from spending days talking to me and then be disappointed.  But hey, if you want to take a chance, let’s blather on.  It’s not a busy time for me.  I have four blissful days off from work!  
Okay.  Here’s my mischief email.  Use it unless it’s not safe for you?  Don’t want you getting into trouble.  [redacted] at that yahoo place.  That’s also the way to chat with me in real time if you’re up for that. 
Here’s some questions I’ve had fun hearing answers to.  Try them out?  I’ll answer in return if you like. 
1) What are you looking for from me as a potential lover? In other words, what fantasies can I help you fulfill? What do you crave? 
2) If you were stranded on an island with a satellite radio that only got one genre of music, what would you pick?
3) What is your favorite feature on a woman?
4) Pub or nightclub?
5) If you had two magic tickets to any event, concert or show in history, where would you take me?
6) How old were you when you lost your virginity? 
Ask me whatever you think might tell you if you’d be comfortable with me.  It’s so tough to know what matters other than the feel of your skin or the glint in your eye when you’re about to explode, or whether I like Heinz or Hunt’s ketchup?  
-Sassy
================
by

Youngsters

From: Mr Truck 
To: Sassy
Monday, Nov 19, 2012
Subject: Youngsters
Hey sexy girl!
I’m going to be free to chat on phone if you want today, tonight and some of tomorrow. Let me know.
Here’s a nice REAL making love scene for you. I love when she sucks his nipples while jacking his cock into her tit:
http://xhamster.com/movies/1048091/sexy_gf_endjy_nasty_bedroom_banging.html
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From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2012 12:45 PM
Subject: Re: Youngsters
Hiya Handsome!
Is your week off to a good start?  I am swamped at work but stealing a few minutes to write to you because you make me smile!
Thanks for the vid… I’ll drool over it when I get home.  I do so appreciate the gems you find!  
I am home all evening… should be free by 7 pm.  So you can call whenever it suits you tonight?  
Here’s my Google Voice number [redated].  It looks like a number from California, if it shows up on your phone bill and anyone cares. 
Oooh!  I can’t wait to hear your voice.  What should we talk about?  🙂  
-S
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From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2012 2:35 pm
Re: Youngsters
Hey gorgeous! Yeah doing ok on this chilly Monday. Thanks for taking time out of your crazy schedule to write.
How do you manage to escape the earshot of hubby on your nighttime chats?
Can’t wait to hear your voice too. We can talk about anything, maybe even……..SEX! We can start out by talking about some of the things that have turned us on lately in porno or anywhere. I won’t be necessarily be expecting to orgasm, but hearing your voice will no doubt give me a delicious hard on 😉
Stan
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From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy 
Sent: Monday, November 19, 2012 7:09 PM
Subject: Re: Youngsters
Hey darlin’  tonight is turning out to look not as free as I previously thought. Hope this doesn’t inconvenience you at all. Are you free for a quick hello tomorrow morning?
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From: Sassy
To: Mr Truck
Re: Youngsters
Nov 19, 2012
Hey there!  I was just watching the video… thinking of you.  🙂  Comments to come… cum? Heh. 
Sorry to hear tonight won’t work but I know stuff happens.  What time tomorrow?  I am usually awake and home between about 7 and 8:30 am, all be it dashing around getting ready.  but I could make a few minutes to hear your voice… but don’t stress if that’s a bad time.   Our moments will happen… when they happen.  I don’t want you taking any risks.  
Mwah!

-S
by

Thanksgiving Tips

To: Scot
Sat, Nov 17, 2012 at 12:31 AM
From: Sassy 
Hiya Scot, 
Wow… I bet you are something when you get in the zone in lecture.  Do you have class next week or will you be all mentally constipated from not lecturing?  We have to work until 12:30 pm Wednesday, then have the rest of the week off!  I am looking forward to a quiet weekend… hope you have a good one!  
-S
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From: Scot
To: Sassy
Saturday, November 17, 2012 2:44 AM
Hey, S.,
I have to work until Tuesday at 5:00 pm.  Then the REAL ordeal begins, when my sister and her husband and two kids; my OTHER sister and her INSUFFERABLE husband; and my brother and his fiancee come to stay at my house.  My parents, bless their hearts, actually sprung for a hotel, but otherwise I’m hosting my whole dysfunctional family.  Fun, fun, fun.  It’s moments like this that make me want to open a vein.
Can I give you a call on Monday?  I have a window from 4:00 to 4:30.
================
From: Sassy
Sun, Nov 18, 2012 at 12:29 AM
To: Scot
Hiya Scot, 
I hope you had a relaxing Saturday.  I sat at the computer catching up with old friends.  Something about Thanksgiving makes me want to know how they’re doing and let them know I am grateful we keep in touch.  I feel as if I’ve traveled to so many places!  I heard from folks from Australia to Wales and many states in between.  
Wow!  That was quite a stream of disdain! Ah, family.  I hope this year will be better because you have a sassy woman to think about.  🙂   Look into using Google Voice so you can call me from your cell without it appearing on your phone bills?  Then you can escape to the porch or go for a post-prandial constitutional and vent to me.  
I used to despise family gatherings, as my older sister and father considered them the perfect occasion for a debate on the philosophical implications of… whatever.  And it would devolve into shouting that sent the rest of the family scurrying away with indigestion and mental anguish.  To fix that, I made us go out to such fine buffets as the Boston Harbor Hotel or Turner Fisheries. Amazing what doesn’t happen when you’re out in public!  And no days of work for my mother, no clean up but alas.. no leftovers.  And I made us go to the movies – no talking there and then a debrief that was amicable for the most part.  It broke the pattern and brought peace.   That is the role of the middle child… peacemaker! 
Now my little sister with the big house hosts (she has the Martha Stewart gene) and invites orphans.  The presence of “strangers” as my mother calls them, makes everyone behave!  And I taught my husband, who gets horribly offended easily, to think, “It’s interesting that they think that,” instead of jumping on people for their wacky ideas.  There was a glitch two years ago when everyone WOULD NOT SHUT UP about cancer two weeks after I was diagnosed and before I knew what the treatment plan would entail and I was very frightened and did not want to think about it.  I ate in the kitchen with my tiny niece who sang Alice’s Restaurant with me!  So now I consider holidays a mild inconvenience.  A free meal.  A day off work.  I am very lucky not to have to travel or cook or host… just clean up until my hands turn into prunes and my back aches.  
Please don’t open a vein before I meet you!  Wait… that didn’t come out right.  I don’t recommend blood-letting at any point.  Perhaps just some leeches? I know… I should not joke.  But I want to make it easier.  I can’t seem to improve my own life this week, but maybe I can add a few smiles to yours?  
Thank you very much for making time to call, but with things so crappy at the office, I don’t dare disappear to talk.  Believe me, I would much rather be talking to you!  Is there any time around the lunch hour?  I know this week is odd, so if not I understand.  I suppose leaving our talks for a rare treat will keep me from taking them for granted.  Hmmm… as with sex, I’d like to get them all the time and see how long it would take to have that happen!  
If all else fails, this time next week it will all be over! 
Hugs with groping!
 -S

================
From: Scot
Nov 18, 2012
To: Sassy
Hey S,
That was a GREAT email.  Thank you.
I’m really sorry things are so unpleasant at work.  Some of my colleagues are jerks, but basically I love my job and wouldn’t trade it for anything.  Still, there are times when I want to quit in frustration and storm out.
Actually, that strategy of inviting strangers to act as a pacifying influence sounds very effective.  Maybe I’ll try it.  I have some Ph.D. students who are too broke to go home for the holidays; perhaps I’ll invite them over on Thanksgiving or subsequent days.  Their presence probably would prevent my sister’s husband from being the all-out ass he normally is.  And they’d get some free food out of it, which, Lord knows, they need.  Good idea.
Lunchtime on Monday is, I regret to report, booked solid.  Lunch is a luxury where I teach.  I guess we’ll have to communicate via email until the holidays are over.  Bet I have to wash more dishes than you!
–Scot