New man writes well

May 5, 2017 Friday

Ashley Madison told me I got a message from a new man today.  I am not much in the mood to answer anyone these days – still hurting from The Trainer disappearing without warning in March… hesitating to set myself up for that again… but it can’t hurt to read it, right?


Message from Ashley Madison

May 5, 2017 9:15 am 
Hello Sassy,

I hope you are enjoying this gorgeous day before the rains come!

Your profile caught my attention because it is so similar to mine! I also want to stay in my marriage, but want to make an emotional and intellectual connection with another. Thank you for stating this so clearly.

I try to be thoughtful, have been told that I have a good sense of humor. A friend describes me as having an Ivy League Education combined with Blue Collar Values. I value the inner person and understand that depth of character and kindness are far more important than superficial good looks.

This response sounds too serious… you will find me easy to get along with and a good listener. Should we find connections, my romantic side will show itself. I hope we can get to know each other.

I look forward to hearing from you.


Oh my… what a lovely message!  And he read my profile!  I guess I’d better look at his profile. 
Age: Hmmm… says he’s 57.  Probably means he’s 59 or so.  Perfect.  I have my best luck with older men.
Location: a town about 30 miles west of Boston.  Perfect. I like men from the west.  
Height: 5’8″.  Hmmm… that’s really no good.  I am so big and tall, shorter men run screaming.  But wait… why not give him a chance?  My profile clearly states my height and weight and I even mention it, and he wrote to me so… maybe I should give him a chance?  Height won’t matter in bed?  I shouldn’t exclude the height-challenged!  
Weight: 190.  That’s good.  Not skinny.  I might not smoosh him. 
Limits: Undecided.  Ick.  I don’t like that one.  It’s better than “Something Short term” but… 
Status: Attached male seeking females.  Perfect.
Smoking Habits: not specified.  Hmm… I can’t deal with smokers.  I may ask about that.  I will be able to tell right away if he does. 
He wrote something under each section (not just checked boxes).  That’s usually a good sign.  And he doesn’t mention sexy stuff, just talked about kindness, understanding, trust.  Nice! 
He mentioned his idea of a perfect date – a trip to Martha’s Vineyard!  It happens to be something Kris and I did, which is one of the most magical days of my life!  
He has no feedback.  That doesn’t mean much.  I don’t think most women use it.  And if they do, men just go open a new account so they look fresh and new.  Which oddly makes me a little leery of breaking in a newbie, but I don’t let it stop me if there are other good qualities. 
He definitely merits a reply!  I’ll wait until I’ve seen The Northerner and get home, see if it still makes sense then. 

Date: May 5th – 9:25pm
From: Sassy

Hiya, How’re you this chilly wet evening? Thank you for your nice message! It’s so great to read about a nice man…you intrigued me so here I am responding. I also adore profiles without checkboxes or typos. 
Three quick questions – What’s your favorite food for a special birthday dinner? What brings you to AM now? How did you hear about it? (I’m curious as well as Sassy!) I adore lobster for special celebrations. I’m on AM because Hubby and I are great friends, but haven’t had sex in a long time. I heard about it while reading a blog online by a guy who shared his adventures. And I’m here because I beat cancer six years ago. I’m whole and healthy, and want to live life to the fullest! 
Men say I am an awesome kisser, a great communicator, very discreet, no drama, super-nice… looking for fun and passion and a confidante. Is that you? Feel free to ask me whatever you like to see if we click, and tell me more about you. Hugs with groping. -Sassy


Date: May 5th – 10:12pm
From: HC

Hello, It is great to hear from you on this cold raw evening. I am going to light the stove in the living room and enjoy the warmth. 

Thank you for your kind words. Let me show my appreciation by answering your questions. Special Birthday Dinner…. How does baked and stuffed lobster sound? I am on AM because my marriage does not meet my needs for intellectual and physical intimacy. My spouse is a good person. She is a successful professional who works long hours. She leaves early and comes home late. Sadly, she often falls asleep by 9 pm. I am a self employed writer and consultant. I spend too much time alone. 
Congratulations on beating cancer! You must be a brave and strong person. I share your motivation to live life to the fullest. I lost three close friends in a year. This was followed my losing my mother, aunt and sister year later. I understand that life is a gift and we must make the best of the time we have on this earth! Unfortunately, my spouse does not share this perspective. 
An awesome kisser, great communicator, super nice… no drama, affectionate and passionate. A confidante who appreciates intellectual intimacy. Yes, that is me and there is much more. I have a second home in Western Mass and a primary residence on the Cape. I use the town in my profile  because it is a 1/2 way point. My home in W Ma offers a private setting. Both my adult children live closer to Boston, so trips to see you are easy for me. Well Sassy, you have obviously piqued my interest.  Daniel

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