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Keep 300 feet back

Sunday, April 21, 2013

I had a meltdown this morning. I feel like a firetruck with a big sign on my butt that says “Danger – Keep 300 ft back.”  Sigh.

With all the craziness this week around the Marathon and the Lockdown, I felt the need to reaffirm that I am alive!  I wanted to talk with a nice man.

1) I decided to try AM chat last night.

I haven’t done it before but I was home alone and bored. I got pinged by a local guy.  He was so easy to talk with!  I felt a great connection.

Maybe you can tell me why a guy would talk to me for two hours, tell me he wants to meet for lunch, tell me he will call in 15 minutes to settle the details and then…NOT CALL?! No call, no email, no message on AM.  When did the lie start?

2)  Mr Truck said we could talk

I’ve been emailing with Mr Truck for 6 months. We have fun sharing p0rn. He tells me when his wife is away and that we should meet, but it never happens. So this time I asked if he could call me. He has a great voice and speaks very well in a sexy way. Oh, great idea, he says. He is a morning person, so he picks 8 am today. So I get up early, get myself all psyched up and… NOTHING.

So I sit at my computer crying, wondering what is wrong with me that two guys in 12 hours can’t be bothered to call me at a time they chose?  I ask for so little and I can’t even get that?

Another chatter had the misfortune to wish me a good morning on IM about 11 am and I whined all over him, poor man.  But that seemed to help.

I need to lower my expectations a lot… and not saddle these men with my need for a special man when all they want is a little chit chat now and then.

Mr. Truck emailed me eventually – so sorry, has the flu, fell asleep on the couch about midnight and missed his alarm. Whatever.

Mr. Hyatt is asking when he can see me. I feel stupid not to do it… but I just don’t care. I should give him a second chance, I suppose. But he doesn’t listen to me… and sends me the oddest videos.  I dunno.

I want to dump them all and focus on Philip. He thinks he can get here to see me again… which makes me sooo happy! But I know I mustn’t give up all my local options just because he might appear for a couple of days.

It was fascinating which of the AM men checked on me on Friday when all hell was breaking lose in my backyard. Two guys – Panties Man and Schenectady Sam, a guy who somehow ended up on my chat list and we’ve talked like… four times. So… marginal guys. Am I wrong to think that if the AM men can’t be bothered to contact me when it seems like the world is coming to an end, I can assume they really don’t care at all?  Not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does.

Wow… that was wicked cranky sounding! Sorry.  I need some time off from AM or some sort of miracle. This week is nutty at work with a big event, so perhaps I’ll just sit back and not think about AM.

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Onward and upward!

Sunday, April 21, 2013
        
2:10pm
Happy Sunday! How’s your day? Beautiful but cold here.

Had a bit of a meltdown. Why would a guy say he is going to call at 8 am and then not do it? Ugh. Ah well. Getting lots done. Onward and upward!

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Trying AM Chat

Saturday, April 20, 2013
I decided to try AM chat tonight.  I haven’t done it for a long time because it costs men a lot of money, and attracts THE WORST spellers and the men looking to collect photos.  None of that appeals!  But I was home alone and bored, so I turned on that feature about 9 pm.
Very quickly, a guy pinged me.  He had an uninspired user name – 3 letters and 3 numbers that don’t mean anything to me and don’t produce anything when I google except that he’s on other dating sites like Adult Friend Finder, Plenty of Fish and a couple swinger/swap sites.  He was polite, with good spelling, and didn’t start off with crude offers.  I clicked on his profile… hmm.  He has my ideal stats – my age, tall, with some weight on him.  Wow.  If he’s telling the truth, he lives about three miles away, but in a very different part of town that is a mix of insular street toughs and yuppies gentrifying the neighborhood.  I wonder which he is?  
He is easy to talk with, asks good questions, tells funny stories.  He doesn’t ask for a photo.  His wife is away for the weekend and he’s lonely.  So he has hopped onto AM to find someone for RIGHT NOW.  He wants me to come over to his house!  Shades of Craigslist.  Yetch.  Yeah… so not happening!!!  I tell him this is way too fast for me, not my style.  He keeps typing. 
He asks if he can see me, wants to call me to make a plan.  Even that seems too much too soon, but I decide it can’t hurt.  We’ve been chatting for two hours and I feel a real connection.  He says he has to walk the dog – he will be back in 15 minutes and we can talk then.  I look at the clock… it’s 11 pm.  Wow!  Time flies when you have a nice man to talk with! 
I go catch up on Facebook, read a few emails, glancing at the clock.  Finally it’s been 15 minutes and… nothing.  I wait.  I type a little something to be sure the AM chat is still active.  30 minutes… 45… it’s midnight.  
Silence.  Grrr… I wonder if he got mugged and is lying in a gutter.  I wonder if his wife called.  Did he get a better offer?  I wonder… if I am an idiot.  I turn off AM’s chat feature and resolve never to turn it back on.  I don’t need this roller coaster ride!  
Maybe you can tell me why a guy would talk to me for two hours, tell me he wants to meet tonight, and if not, then for lunch tomorrow, ask to talk on the phone to settle the details and then…NOT CALL?!  No call, no email, no message on AM.  When did the lie start?

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Maine day

Saturday, April 20, 2013
    
7:01am
Good morning! Driving mom to Maine for a funeral. Lots of hometown thoughts today.
9:42am Phil 
Safe travels.

10:13am
Made it! So pretty with all the old homes.

11:35am Phil
Love it up there

5:02 pm
Home again, home again!
Nothing like traveling through three states and back again in 7 hours! Whee!

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Lockdown

Friday, April 18, 2013 
Another of those “days I will never forget.” It happened in stages:
Finding out
Spreading the word 
Looking for hugs
Sneaking out
Blogging
Payroll 
Chatting 
Relief
6:30 am  The phone rang.  I looked at the clock radio and wondered who would be calling me at too early o’clock.  Then I heard the robo-voice from the City on my answering machine.  I couldn’t make out what was said, and I drifted back to sleep.  
7:00 am My alarm was going off.  I should wake up.. I should… then I hear Hubby’s voice.  “You can turn that off, you’re not going anywhere,” he says in a very serious tone.  This does not make any sense.  He explains that the city is in “lockdown” and we’ve been asked to “shelter-in-place” while they hunt for one of the bombing suspects.  What?  These words don’t make sense either.  We have never heard either word before, not in terms of us.  
So I get up and get online.  I read work email… my employer sent 8 emergency texts overnight.  The new boss emailed everyone at 6:18 am telling us the office is closed.  Stay safe.  I begin to understand that there is no going to work or anywhere and that it is going to be another strange day in an odd week.
7:38 am Text Sister visiting Europe this week.  Hate to disturb her, but feel like she should know.  
8:00 am Finished texting and emailing co-workers to be sure they know not to go to the office.  Began reading the news, trying to figure out what’s going on.  MIT cop shot dead… one bombing suspect dead… another in Watertown they think.  Big search.  Everything closed, T shut down, everything cancelled.  Wow.  This is different.  It reminds me of the snowstorm in February, except it’s a beautiful spring day.  
I turned to Facebook.  A friend’s home in Watertown searched by police looking for the bomber.  Another was caught up in the police chase after the shooting last night.  A third taught the second suspect in high school… nice kid.  A fourth works at MIT and parks in the lot where the cop was sitting when he was shot.  and the suspects lived on the same block as another friend… it’s all TOO CLOSE.  
8:12 am Email from friend in Philadelphia worried about us.  So good to hear from her. 
9:12 am FB msg Philip looking for a hug.  Don’t get it.  Marvel at how different people react. 
9:45 am Began to get emails, texts, IMs from friends all over.  Notice who writes… not who I would have thought.  Helps to know they are thinking of me.  Sister calls from Europe.  We marvel at how close we are to all this mess. 
10:11 am Start Google Talking to a blogger pal.  He fulfills my need to talk to someone.  Work on posting an FFF. 
11:00 am Hubby convinces me to sneak out to get breakfast.  He wants to walk – I talk him into letting me drive.  I throw on clothes and we venture out.  We hear the neighbor leaving, telling his wife to lock the door behind him.  He is headed to work in a non-locked down area. 
11:40 am I sit in the car with the window open while Hubby gets food from Dunkin Donuts.   It is the only thing allowed open – to serve the first responders.  No one is in there.  It is eerily quiet.  Only sounds are the birds and the helicopters.  It reminds me of 9/11 and the day after.  Same sun… same quiet. 
12:01 Operation “sneak out for donuts” is complete. 
1:50 pm Finish and post the FFF.  Kibbitz with blogger pal about it, go read other posts and comment. 
2:00 pm Start work on the payroll.  Chat with AM buddies working outside the lockdown zone.  Say it is mostly normal except everyone is following the news and not working.  My mother calls. 
3:00 pm Finish payroll.   Make another go at reading the news.  
4:29 pm Post to Facebook with link to bizarre photos of empty streets around Boston, Cambridge and Somerville.  Empty Downtown Crossing, Kenmore, Mass Ave… no cars, no people. Spooky. 
4:30 pm Crawl into bed for a nap.  
6:00 pm Hear Hubby talking to a pal, telling her I am sound asleep.  I turn on the radio news.  The lockdown is lifted!  Hubby leaves for a dinner with friend.  I feel very alone and hungry.   I get up and go into the chat.  They distract me. 
7:00 pm I make a bowl of soup, keep an eye on chat and Facebook. 
9:00 pm I begin to hear rumors that they’ve caught the second suspect!  I pop around the net looking for confirmation.  Finally, there is a Boston Police Department tweet.  They’ve got him.  I feel relieved.  I so wanted to think of something else now. 
I call my mom, checking on our plans for tomorrow.  Still on.  That means waking up at 6:30 am.  
I mostly listen in chat… it’s a good distraction.   
10:41 pm write back to a friend in Chicago.  Good to hear from her.  
12:00 I made myself go to bed so I’d be awake to drive in the morning.  

I have a new appreciation for being able to go out of the house!  And a new awareness of how we are not safe.  People say “Stay safe.”  How can I do that?  It could have been any of us, anywhere, that someone set a backpack down next to and stared them right in the eye, and walked away. Ugh. Hoping this won’t give others ideas.  
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FFF Four Men

Welcome to another fantastic Flash Fiction Friday!  Tom has found another challenging photo and prompted us to write about it.  Click over to his blog, Three Spelling Mistakes, to see what he and other bloggers came up with.  My take is below.  There’s the prompt: 
Word Count: Minimum 200, Maximum 400
Bonus Words: +100 if you can explain why she’s wet… and wearing heels.
Required Word: Found
Forbidden Word: Lost

Extra Credit: How many men are in this picture?
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I love Friday mornings!  I don’t have to go to the office.  I take the dogs for a run on the beach, wave at the neighbors, then have a leisurely shower in my outdoor water room with the sun beating down on my wet skin.
My shower shoes and towel were nowhere to be found, but my silly red sky-high pumps were by the back door where I’d dropped them yesterday so I toddled into the house naked except for my bright red shoes.  I opened the windows to let in the breeze, and heard the roar of the lawn mower from next door.  
Oooh goodie!.  The lawn care team was here.  I dashed to the front steps to watch as Bobby cut the box hedge with his shirt off.  That man has a beautiful back and the best butt in four counties!  His brother Richie was on the side of the house.  People think they’re twins because they have the same birthday and look so much alike, but one night in a local bar Richie was on his fourth beer, put his hand on my knee and told me he was exactly one year older.  He made me promise not to tell.  Their dad Paul was riding the mover back and forth, keeping an eye on them so they didn’t sneak off to the beach and leave the grounds to grow wild.  Nothing like a yard full of handsome men to ogle! 
Sometimes I go back around to my back yard and lie on a chaise to dry in the sun, sipping a hazelnut iced coffee and daydreaming about the three men appearing at the fence.  Something about them watching, nudging each other, bulges growing in their work pants… mmm… and then I call one of them over to play.  He crawls onto the chaise with me and we have our fun while the others jerk off in the background.  And sometime I call the other two over and give them all a good time with my mouth and my hands and my body… being worshipped by each of them in a different hole!  Oh my!  
There was an added bonus today!  Greg, the next door neighbor, was coming in from the farmers market with a grocery bag full of corn on the cob.  They must be having a barbecue later.  Maybe I could get myself invited over.  He grills the most amazing seafood!  
I was just thinking it was a good thing none of them ever look my way when Greg glanced up.  He waved and then stared.  I waved back.  I’d been found out!  He dropped the sack.  He knelt down to gather up the wayward ears, but never took his eyes off me.  At this distance, I couldn’t tell if he was focused on my chest or top of my legs, but I could see his smile.  I enjoyed his appreciative attention.  I headed to the back yard to add a fourth man to my fantasies!  
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Armpit hair

From: Mr Truck 
To: Sassy
Sent: Wednesday, April 17, 2013 7:17 AM
Subject: Re: Office visit
Yeah that normal-looking couple in the video were pretty yummy, it’s so fun to watch couples fuck.
I still am amazed that you were growing your armpit hair for me. What did it looks like, was it dark or blonde? Now with summer just down the road, doubtful if I’ll see it on you!
Oh Sassy, you’re so sweet and loving to call me special. You’re pretty special yourself honey, must be loved by so many. Can you imagine the love we’re going to make?!
What was the breakfast video, the one with the ‘normal’ couple I just sent?
I’d bet anything that you are so damn good that women would want to channel YOU!
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From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Wednesday, April 17, 2013 7:58 AM
Subject: Re: Office visit
Good morning!  
I sent that breakfast video on to a couple of men, and they liked it.  A lot.  Got me some very hot IMs!  Ha ha. 
My underarm hair is dark and straight.  Figures that the hair I’d like to be white is dark and vice versa!  I do feel like an idiot for not taking a photo before I shaved.  Doh!  
Could we talk and sigh and moan on Sunday morning?  I am in a spin most mornings getting off to work, and I have to be with my mom on Saturday. 
-S
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From: Mr Truck 
To: Sassy
Sent: Apr 17, 2013 9:18 am 
Subject: Re: Office visit
I like it that you have other males in your fan club. Do any of them like to talk/fantasize about 3somes and cream pies? 😉
Dark and straight?!!! That’s my favorite kind. Must look oh so hot against your pale white skin and also contrasted by your silver hair. I don’t remember what kind of pussy hair you have. I remember you said it was sparse. I bet it’s so soft and kissable. Can’t wait for you to spread your pussy lips for me. I could stare at sweet pussy for hours, and online sometimes I do!
Yes Sunday a.m. is good, maybe around 8?  Hope you have fun with your mom. 
Excited to talk again!

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Spicy Green Beans

Thursday, April 18, 2013
6:13 pm
Dim Sum!  We hit PF Chang’s again for their appetizer happy hour.  I’m in love with their spicy green beans.

8:01pm
Hiya kid! Hope you’re having a good Thursday. I left my phone home, crazy day at work, Hubby decided dinner out… whee! Hugs to you!

12:30am

Ugh… campus policeman shot and killed at MIT.
What is going on?! I need a hug.

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Lick it

From: Sassy
To: Rick 
Sent: Wed, 17 Apr 2013 11:02 AM
Subject: Re: Office visit
Good morning!  
Did you see Stephen Colbert’s homage to Boston?  It’s wicked funny.  🙂  
http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/ifpmy1/intro—4-16-13
2 minutes of sass! 
Tell me what color today? 
-S
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From: Rick
To: Sassy
Sent: Apr 17, 2013 11:31 AM
Subject: Re: Office visit
I heard it driving to work.   Great to have some humor!
Ummmmm…..I’m a little shy telling you what color today 
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From: Rick 
To: Sassy
Sent: Apr 17, 2013 1:06 PM
Subject: Re: Office visit
Carnation…olga hi cut without a stitch, carnation. with lace waistband.
wish you could see them for yourself….
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From: Sassy
To: Rick
Sent: Wed, 17 Apr 2013 2:54 PM
Subject: Re: Office visit
Ah… good man.  Thank you.  That gets my imagination going! 
how I tell you to drop your slacks… polite but firm. 
how I would stare while you stood there blushing…  tell you how gorgeous you look. 
I’d get you to raise your arms above your head, turn this way and that, so I could get a really good view.  
I’d watch you get harder and harder… you can’t hide that bulge!  
I would put my hands on you… first just a finger… teasing around that lace… 
then along each leg… then a quick press in the middle, to feel the wonderful fabric as you tremble.  
You’d see the look of fire in my eyes.  
I’d ask you questions… easy questions… about how you feel, about what you want… 
but I would keep doing what I want to do. 
I would walk around you, exploring your body, squeezing your ass.  Rubbing you here and there.  
I’d bend you over the desk… and begin to peel down those pretty panties.  Touching.  You can’t see me now… only feel what I do and wonder what will come next.  Slap!  I’d see how you react to a tap on a cheek.  Slap!  And then the other.  Then I’d lean over, hold your hips in my hands and lick… yes… lick that beautiful ass… find the crack and lick from the top down toward your most sensitive spots.  Slurp.  Flick.  Mmm…. tasty! 
Then I’d turn you around and peel down the front… just a little.  You’d be wondering again… what is she going to do?  
Do you want to hear more? 
-S
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From: Rick 
To: Sassy
Sent: Wed, Apr 17, 2013 3:15 PM
Subject: Re: Office visit
YES!!!!!  More and More! 
I love your mind
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From: Rick 
To: Sassy
Sent: Wed, Apr 17, 2013 6:08 PM
Subject: Re: Office visit
I LOVE the anal play!  That you would lick it!  I am embarrassed to admit to anyone else how exciting it would be to massage your butt cheeks, playing with them.  Then hearing your commanding voice ‘lick my ass NOW!’  
Lying on my back, you riding my face, you choosing whether my tongue is serving your front or back. 
Then you on your front or standing up, my face deep on the folds of your ass using my long tongue to make you squirm