Remembering my dad

March 2011
texts
Note: times show up in my time zone, but his are actually an hour earlier (Central time)
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
7:53 am Good morning!  My kitty is helping me get ready.  He’s a goof, loves to lie on his back and wave his feet until I pet his tummy.  Have a terrific Tuesday!
7:57 am Phil: I do that too except it’s not my tummy I want rubbed.  J  Have a great day!
7:58 pm Hey, kid.  Good day?  Work was wicked busy – I earned my pay today!  Prepping tax papers for accountant now.  Ick.
10:54 pm Done w/ taxes.  Yay!  Wondering how you and Sally are getting along living together full-time… hoping it’s better than you thought.
11:41 pm Phil: Better than I thought.  Still a work in progress.  She is really working hard at it which is a first.
11:59 pm Oh, that’s great!  Hubby is being awful.  Not interested in me at all, propositioned two different women at the last party, doing zilch around here.  Sigh.
12:07 am On that cheery note, I’ll say good night.  Sleep well, sweet man.
Wednesday, March 2
5:55 am Phil: That sucks.  He just does not recognize what he has.  Men can be such dumb asses!  Off to work.  Up at 4 am.  Yuck
7:51 am Good morning!  34 and sun, lovely,  Two kitties w/me – that’s a first.  What got you up at “ridiculous o’clock?”  Hope it goes well!
7:59 am Phil: Seeing what the folks do first thing in the morning.  Showing my smiling face.  Its invigorating to see all that activity first thing in the morning!
8:12 am Stepped on the scale – down 25 pounds!  Woot!
8:15 am Phil:  Awesome!  Good for you!
11:36 am How’s your weight doing?  I’d love to lose until I weight less than you some day… but I had to bat men away in droves last time that was tue, so maybe not.  J
1:50 pm Phil: Ah, just buy a big stick.  My weight is the same.  I’d like to be 30 lbs lighter and I tend to do that in the warmer weather with longer days.  I like 20 mile bike rides and it really burns off the weight. 
5:12 pm Big stick?  Reminds me of something else… Great that you haven’t gained, w/ winter and stress and home cooking.   
5:40 pm Sorry I unloaded on you re: H.  I talked to him and he did a bunch of chores, so hope for better.
6:19 pm Phil: No problem.  Unload anytime you desire.  Glad to hear he is doing better
11:40 pm Got so much done tonight, great feeling!  Clean sheets.  Clean clothes.  Car detailed.  Kitchen clean.  Groceries.  Whee!
11:58 pm Thank you very much for the tribute to my dad you posted online!  Amazing words.  I appreciate it more than I can say.  Cried.  Needed to.  You are the nicest man.  Sleep well.
Thursday, March 3
7:39 am Good morning!  Cold again, 12 brr.  Off to eat a big breakfast at Kelly’s Diner with a pal, then chemo #3.  Have a great Thursday, Philip!
7:45 pm Phil: Nice day here.  Going on a beer and wine tour Saturday!  I can’t wait.  Sounds like a blast.  Have a great day!
3:24 pm Home from chemo.  Went well.
7:24 pm Feeling better than I did after the other rounds.  Must be the chocolate ice cream my pal made me eat to keep from my mouth from getting sore!  I’m not big on dessert but it tasted good today.  How’re you doing? 
7:26 pm  Phil: Good.  Doing very well.  Finishing my workout and then home for a drink.  Glad to hear it went better!
7:29 pm Waiting on delivery of Indian food, surfing Facebook… staying out of trouble.  [Man’s Name] is coming from Long Island for Dad’s memorial.  Dad got him into college.  Do you remember that family?
7:30 pm Phil:  I do remember them

7:30 pm Phil:  Love Indian food
7:31 pm His dad ran the bar.
7:31 pm shrimp korma.  Garlic naan.  Chicken saag.  Mango lassi.
7:32 pm Phil: Yum.  I like it Vindaloo hot
7:32 pm wasn’t one of his sisters in your class?  
7:34 pm Of course you’d eat vindaloo. I like the taste but it’s one of the few things that’s too hot for me.
7:36 pm ever cook it?  My older sister spent a year awhile back only making Indian food… very odd.
7:36 pm Phil: Love it with good garlic naan
7:38 pm Phil: I try, not as easy as you think.  Easier to find a good place and go there.  I always tell them Indian Hot
7:41 pm  Yum.  Nice people run our Indian restaurant.
7:43 pm Phil: They are nice people.  Brits and Japanese love curry.  They like it hot too.  Ate Indian a lot in both places.
10:41 pm Finally watched NCIS.  Good one.
10:42 pm off to bed.  Sleep well, sweet man.  Wish you could wake me early.
10:55 pm Phil: Nite Sass
Friday, March 4
6:42 am  Good morning!  Sunny, 19.  No office today – back to MGH for bone marrow booster shot then dinner with cousins arriving for the memorial and entire family at sis’s.  Have a fine Friday!
9:17 am Who posts on your work FB – just you or others?  Great quotes.  I read wikepedia about the various positions – wicked cool!
9:23 am Phil: Mostly me.  If it’s from my work FB id, that’s me.  It it’s from the page itself, mostly me but sometimes others.  Thank you. 
12:21 am Easy time getting booster shot.  Didn’t effect me much – just a little tired.  Pizza and spinach/pear/walnut salad with sis and cousins.  She got German choc cake for Hubby’s birthday, surprised him.  Cousins are a hoot!
12:40 am I long for you something fierce.  Why does it hit me so hard tonight?  Maybe talk of our home town – 2 car loads of them coming over tomorrow.  I have our first kiss at camp on my mind… memorable and electric you said.  Mmm… powder.  Sleep well, sweet man.
Saturday, March 5
8:21 am Good morning!  40 and rain. Trying to focus on honoring dad.  Service at 11 am, collation.  Praying it all goes well.  Have a grand time with beer tour.  I toured the brewery there in ’81, wicked cool.
8:27 pm Phil: You will do fine.  You had a special relationship.  Remember those times and it will flow.  Nice that home town crowd is coming.  I’m proud of them.  I know you will do fine.
8:31 am I dreamed you drove me to camp.  Right before you left town.  And the nurse’s cabin was open.  And we… spent a long time there.  May have to write that up.
8:39 am My sis made an amazing slideshow, I hope to get it online.  It got us all remembering.  I am pretty calm, focusing on helping Mom.  Thank you.
9:11 am Phil: love to see that
3:43 pm Done.  Memorial went really well.  Home w/ Chinese take-out.  How’s the tour?
3:47 pm Phil: [He sent me a photo of a restaurant – Mader’s in Milwaukee. ]
3:56 pm Beer?  Bratwurst?
4:05 pm Phil: Glad to hear!  All of the above!
4:12 pm Are you mellow?
4:41 pm Phil: Oh, yeah, fun day
5:59 pm Phil: Maeders is amazing – Old style German!  Very cool.  Hope your day was OK and honored your Dad like you want it to
7:27 pm Home?  I’m headed out for Mexican with the cousins
8:05 pm Phil: Just got there
8:42 pm You would’ve loved my dinner – seared scallops with creamy bacon mushroom sauce. 
8:43 pm Buy any beer?  Or wine?
8:46 pm Phil:  Oh wow!  Sounds fabulous.  I had a brat in a pretzel roll with sauerkraut and onions with cheese curds.  Bought some beer and cheese.
8:48 pm Mmm… cheese curds.  Brats.  Beer.  You must’ve been in heaven!
8:50 pm Phil: oh yeah J
8:50 pm Waiting on dessert…
[sent him the photo of Churros and ice cream with choc sauce]
9:21 pm Headed home at last. 
9:25 pm Phil: Oh yeah!
10:15 pm Finally home.
11:15 pm Did you conk out?
11:37 pm Phil: Nah, winding down.
11:38 pm Chat or is that impossible?
11:40 pm Phil:  For a minute
11:41 pm How you doing?
[We switched to Facebook- see the Love Chat post]

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One thought on “Remembering my dad”

  1. I can’t get over how upbeat you are during this. Illness and the death of a family member are monumental stress points. You have a good and positive attitude!

    Confused about husband – with all that was going on was he not supportive at all? If not physically at least emotionally?

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