Thus Spoke Zarathustra or Ryan’s Rules of AM






Thus Spoke Zarathustra
Dear Readers,

I have a special treat for you!  As you may have read, I have been puzzling my way through the wilds of Ashley Madison, that amazing and terrible online dating site for “married but looking” folks who want to find that special someone who is also “married but looking.”  I may come up with my own rules after I’ve had more adventures, but for now, The Wizard of Blogs, the talented and sexy Ryan Beaumont of “The Ashley Madison Adventures of a Regular Guy Gone Bad has given me his sage advice and allowed me to post his rules so they can help you too!  He also included his trademark detailed philosophical analysis with an incredible synthesis and symbiosis with one of the greatest musical compositions of our time! Like many great rules of our time, I do not understand them.  But I break them anyway!  I hope you will do the same!  

or the Rules of Ashley Madison
by R. Beaumont

1.  You don’t talk about Ashley Madison to your spouse (you blog about it)

2.  You don’t talk about Ashley Madison to your spouse (you blog about it)

3.  If someone says “stop” or quits writing after 2 messages the hook up is over; no regrets, no more wasted credits.

4.  Only two people to a message (be original to the next lady)

5.  As many AM partners as possible until all fantasies are found or the best partner arises.

6.  No shirts, no shoes, no underwear, no regrets!

7.  Affairs and the resulting sex will go on as long as they need to.

8.  If this is your first time on AM, you have to respond (at least once).

The other day I was busy not working as I am often want to do.  I began chatting with Sassy and she told me of her upcoming series of Ashley Madison experiential posts.  That got us to thinking about Ashley Madison.  Soon I realized that Ashley Madison needs rules thus formalizing it and making it a true institution worthy of all this blogging.  Of course once I realized AM needed rules I realized that perhaps it already had rules that just needed to be illuminated.  Well really I just thought maybe somebody had already done the work for me and I could just cut and paste.  I thought about movies and songs I had heard and seen and realized that “Fight Club,” that brilliant 1999 Cult Classic, had rules thus already providing the perfect form for this manifesto.  This was perfect, I could just rip that off, why make Nihilism hard you know!

I did my usual “wiki research” on Fight Club and realized it was in fact the perfect metaphor for Ashley Madison.  The themes it uses include “Rebel without a Cause” and Nietzschean pedagogy.  In a world diluted by the “despair and paralysis people feel from a value system grown out of advertising,” Ashley Madison is the perfect surrender and thus synthesis of that market driven pursuit while simultaneously rising above and defeating the “eternal recurrence of the same.”  Ashley Madison provides that Nihilistic pursuit of “life affirmation.”  Life’s pursuits on Ashley Madison are a trek towards questioning the “doctrines that drain one’s expansive energies.”  I know, I know “you really are full of it today Beaumont;” I hear you thinking!

But let’s really break down all the Nihilistic Existentialism and where it leads.  You see a little Nietzsche can be a dangerous thing, just like AM, left in the wrong hands.  We need rules to make it right.  I know rules and Nietzsche don’t mix but perhaps a thought by Jean Paul Sartre can pull this together for us.  Sure Sartre felt man had no inherent value but you have to read on.  Btw, it’s the fact that someone has treated someone else with no apparent value that leads us to Ashley Madison in the first place, right!?

See Sartre felt that existence precedes essence.  While it may be true that one’s essence is more immutable than one’s existence, one’s existence in pursuit of consciousness ultimately creates value and the underlying meaning of life.  It is that pursuit of consciousness that creates essence and formation of essence is what makes life worth living.

Although now as I’m thinking about this from the female perspective I’m thinking what do these Euro dudes know about women?  Well if you don’t want to take the word of some French or German guy that looks like he never had sex with anything other than his left hand, let’s look to Simone de Beauvoir (not a cousin of mine) who said “one is not born a woman, she becomes one.”  I would take that a step forward and say too often women realize that they do not transform into “womanhood” via marriage.  Too often they look up in their 30’s or 40’s and say “who am I and how did I get here?  Did I choose this path or was it chosen for me?  And if I’m on this path can I get off?”  Again, the pursuit of consciousness and the underlying achievement of essence forms the meaning of our humanity (or for Simone “womanhood”).But let’s get back to fight club.  Why should all the philosophical gobledygook mean that the Rules of Fight Club should be segued into a Rules of Ashley Madison.  Let’s see if the two paths indeed cross!
Two early quotes in Fight Club lead to it’s basic theme “losing all hope is freedom” and “when you have lost everything you are free to do anything.”  And there you go, it’s often that we log onto AM at the point we lose all hope and we just might find freedom.  Perhaps you are not on AM because you lost all hope but in the words of Tyler Durden “never be complete, evolve!”
What you realize quickly on AM, much like Fight Club, is that “who you (are on AM) is not who you (are) in the real world.”  It is true that once an affair starts or even ends nothing is really solved but nothing is wholly wasted either.  I will paraphrase a Tyler quote which I believe sums it all up:  you are looking for a way to change your path in life and you need a roadmap or at least some directional signage.  That could be AM.  On AM you can look the way you want to look, fuck the way you want to fuck.  You will find that in someone’s eyes you are sexy, smart, and capable and perhaps most importantly are free to be the person you want to be.   So as Ed Norton’s character in the movie is so fond of “single serving friends,” you might just try out a “single serving” affair partner and see where that leads.  It may be that doorway or first step toward essence.
We make choices in life but they are part of an evolution.  So while I never would say ignore your commitments to the one’s who matter in your life, I would say get busy evolving!  And follow those damn rules!


Wow, that was a lot of thoughtifying bull *hit.  You know now that I think about it I could have just ripped off a quote from that other Nihilistic Cult Classic Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure and saved us all the last five minutes of our life.  I think I’ll do that now!



Of course a better way to get from that “tabula rasa” to “vini vidi vici” moment is through blogging!



“O man, take care!
What does the deep midnight declare?
“I was asleep—
From a deep dream I woke and swear:—
The world is deep,
Deeper than day had been aware.
Deep is its woe—
Joy—deeper yet than agony:
Woe implores: Go!
But all joy wants eternity—
Wants deep, wants deep eternity.”
from Thus Spoke Zarathustra

Also Sprach Zarathustra, Op. 30 – Strauss

http://youtu.be/dfe8tCcHnKY

Blonde Angel

From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy 
Subject: Blonde Angel
November 5, 2012 9:47 am 
http://xhamster.com/movies/1551442/beautiful_big_tits_blonde_bbw_loves_to_fuck.html

There is so much to like about this girl I don’t know where to start. I usually prefer older and more of a plain Jane or butter face, but she’s so damn cute and has such a sweet enthusiastic smile after she gets her well earned facial (well more of just on her chin, she and her fans did deserve a more of a larger load on her forehead, nose, and cheeks) I thought you’d appreciate it. She loves to play cock games too which is delightful especially when she looks right into the camera. And I could watch her walk around naked all day!
-Stan
==========
From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Wednesday, November 7, 2012 7:59 PM
Subject: Re: Blonde Angel 
Hiya Stan!
I finally had a chance to watch this duo more carefully.  What an interesting couple – lots of differences that don’t matter at all in bed.  Yay!
And amazing to see someone bigger than I am!  With a smaller guy.  Goes against so many stereotypes.  
Classic red nail polish… nice. 
She has the largest nipples I’ve ever seen!  Still don’t like the hairless look on their pubes.  But I know it makes it so we can see more on her… 
It is so fun how they reach for each other and seem so into it.  
Great sound… lots of mmm… hissing… from them both!
And talking!  How he talks to her, encourages her, and how she speaks up, “Why don’t you take these off?”  to get what she wants and talks dirty… “that big prick of yours.”  Yum.  Nice how she checks on him “Feel good?” and he sasses her, “Do you hear me complaining?”  hee. 
Fun…. teasing.  Smacking. 
She has a sweet way of smiling at the camera, but it was a little too much looking at the camera and not at him… breaks the “fourth wall” though I can see how some people might like the idea that the camera and being filmed is part of the naughty nature of it.  But it pulls focus for me. 
Interesting that she had bad skin on her legs… that they didn’t cover it.  Makes it more “real people” feel. 
Very nice cock/slit rubbing.  (Twinge for me here!)
There’s the deck chair position!  That slapping sound… oh yes.
I know guys hate them and it hasn’t made it into much p0rn, but I get antsy when there’s no condom.  Have to tell myself a little story about her being on the pill and they’re monogamous and….risking a grisly death is not cool.  But I try not to let that spoil it.  
Is the lube the cue that he is fucking her ass when they doggie style?  Surprised they didn’t show that entrance or action.
Little spanks are nice. 
Interesting that she focusing completely on his shaft… never touches his ball or ass… 
Tits…lube… sliding… got to me.
And their foreheads together… staring at each other’s eyes.  
Whoa!  The camera man speaks! Never heard that before.  
The sounds of her hands sliding over him… and him helping her get it just right.  Yum.  And he told her when he was going to cum… Nice how she sucked him even after he came… get those last drops. 
The ending was a little odd… but it was better than the often “it just stops” thing.  
I would add some kissing.  Here, there and everywhere. 
Thanks, Stan, for finding one that glorifies a large woman, and shows what I have been wanting to do!  
-S
===============
From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy 
Subject: re: Blonde Angel
Nov 8, 2012
Oh babe, you are such an amazing porn analyst! Have a few moments to leave a few comments:
Yes, I like natural pubes, love how a bush adorns a woman’s vulva.  I too noticed and actually liked the chafe marks on her inner thighs. A lot of very big women have that, it’s so private, I like kissing all over the marks. I go for stretch marks on breasts and tummies too. It’s just so natural and real.
More soon!
-Stan

Slutty Saturday Seven

From my private journal
November 4, 2012 07:48 pm – Slutty Saturday

 My my my… what a day this was!  Conventional wisdom says weekends are the quiet time in the cheating world, as people have to focus on their families.  That’s usually true but NOT TODAY!  
After a quiet week swapping p0rn with Mr Truck, I heard from SEVEN men today… TOO MUCH!  I seem to be fulfilling Marian Daniell’s mother’s advice that every woman needs seven men in her life.  Heh.  

I had friendly online chats with 2 chatters, a delicious phone call with a blogger and contact with 4 AM men! The emails, IMs and phone calls were flying!  
TWO new AM men sent me messages yesterday!  They spent money to contact me.  Wow.  Nothing like the “start the month off fun” guys! 
1) MidKnight
A brand new AM guy!  Late 40s.  Okay.  Nearby in the same city.  Nice.  6″2 195.  Another tall and skinny one.  I can deal with that.  Hmm… “unhappy husband of an unappreciative wife.”  No no no… don’t bitch about your wife in your profile!  “Looking for a lady who has a wild side.  Fun.  Companionship.”  That’s better.  Vague but fine.  He posted a lovely photo of himself in a suit and tie, standing in a law library.  Heh.  Bet it came from his work web site.  I worry about men who show their face.  Really?  But it was a nice face.

I sent him my mischief Yahoo email and he pinged me on Yahoo IM mid-afternoon!  It’s awkward to start out chatting without any previous emails, but I ran with it.  He seemed distracted, said he was watching college football with his son, and didn’t have long.  Gosh, mister, way to make a woman feel wanted… NOT! I got to ask a few questions.  Good answers!  Another lawyer!  He took off after about 20 minutes saying he’d ping me tonight.  But he never did.  

Lesson learned: I can have a lovely chat, just start feeling a spark and liking the guy and wanting to know more and… he didn’t feel it and that’s it.  How could he not get that I am THE BEST WOMAN EVAH?  Hee hee.  Ah well… I hope he found another lady and had lots of fun. 
2) Speedy 
The second brand new guy on AM!  Let’s see… 50.  Sure.  From… hunh… the next state over.  Hmm… if he will visit my area, do I care?  5″10 160… uh oh.  Shorter and skinny!  But… maybe I will take a chance… not pay so much attention to height and weight?  I want guys to do that for me, I should do it for them, right?  He checked a few random boxes.  Eh.  Then he wrote a little bit:

What really turns him on: “Would like to meet an intelligent, uninhibited, woman with a good sense of humor and a high drive.” Do I have a high drive?  I suppose so.  Sounds like me.  
He closed with: “I’m an intelligent, professional, fit guy, with a good sense of humor.  Communication creates chemistry. Let’s talk. Would be happy to share photos off of this venue.”  Makes sense.  But it doesn’t give me much to work from.  
He gave me his Yahoo email in his first message, so I responded there.  His second message included a photo – just his face.  He looks like… Seinfeld!  With gray hair.  Very distinguished!  Another suit and tie, probably his business website photo.  He asked if we could switch to IM.  Sure.  He gave me his real first time, and his work website… hmm… I’d rather not know!  But you know I googled him.  Nothing freaky.  We typed along and very soon he said he wanted to hear my voice, could he call me?  Wow… um… sure.  Definitely felt like a salesman needing to meet his quota.  Heh.  Moving very fast but it all sounds good, so I roll with it.  This is definitely the fastest I’ve ever gone from contact to the phone. We had a very sexy conversation.  He sent me an email right after, and called again just after dinner.  Wow!  Full court press!  It felt great! 
3) Rick aka “Panties Man” 
He was in the midst of writing a paper for school, pinged me in Yahoo IM to check in.  He is so polite and nice!  He couldn’t stay long but he made me feel special that he took the time to check in.  
4) The Professor
The great cypher professor checked in.  I gave him my phone number.  He said he would call on Monday from his office.  I never went to office hours in college but maybe I can get something from a professor now?  I bet he has a wonderful voice from all that lecturing!  
This definitely felt like TOO MUCH!  And it doesn’t count Stan or Tom or Philip… geesh.  
But who to give up?  How to step back?  Hmmm… which one is going to touch me?  Make me smile most often?  No way to tell… might as well leave all my irons in the fire until something happens.

Truck’s Ass Play

From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Thursday, November 1, 2012 3:16 PM
Subject: Re: Storm stories
Hiya Stan,
You are so cute when you’re horny!  Whee!
I have a fun strap-on video.  She has three different toys she uses gently, sweetly with lots of lube!  It’s long but has some great moments.  I like hearing him.  Taught me a lot! 
Sadly, my ass play experience consists of once a long time ago where the guy tore me to shreds.  So I want to forget about it and “start over” with someone who knows what they’re doing and can help me enjoy it.  
Ah, words for my lady part.  It’s an ongoing joke that I don’t like any of them.  I looked at a site that had 2,753 words… none of which sounded right.  But I have gotten used to pussy (though it makes me giggle) and I know that cunt means… mmmm…”this guy is really revved up.”  As long as he uses it in a positive way.  
Thanks for explaining about cum slut.  It sounds like me, at least mentally.  Need more chances to carry it out!  Slut used to make me absolutely unhappy, because people used that in high school when I was confirmed virgin, and meant it in the most evil sense.  But I am learning the more subtle and positive meanings.  A blogger helpfully suggested thinking “you’re not A slut, your are MY slut” as a way to feel better about it and that helped.  Ah, vocabulary.  
I do like to be licked all over.  The combo of the physical sensations plus the mental naughty connotation make it lots of fun.  And kisses that end up at the top of my legs?  I’d be wild by the time you got there!  Anticipation….yum.
I had a quiet evening.  Without kids and living in a big building, Halloween is a non-event for us.  
Today I have on dark blue slacks, a black jersey top with buttons all up the front, and dark blue silky scarf.  Underneath is a lucky black bra and some wild tiger briefs!   And a very hot woman!  You’d have fun.  I indulged in a few minutes of thinking about you undoing, undressing and the look on your face when you see what’s underneath and can touch… mmmm… I do wish you were in town this evening!
===========
From: Mr Truck 
Nov 1, 2012
To: Sassy
Only have a second to say thanks for the video. I was watching the video and enjoying all the fine lubed technique of the woman when all of the sudden I nearly fell out of my seat when she donned the strap on. That guy is so appreciative (and has cute little nipples just like me!) and so lucky. You are realllllllly teasing me right out of my boxers pretty lady. Are you gonna make me suck your strap on before you use it one me? It’s only right isn’t it?
Talk tomorrow sweet cakes
Stan

Cum slut

From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Tuesday, October 30, 2012 9:59 PM
Subject: Re: Storm stories
Hiya Stan!  
I hope your “day after Sandy” went well.  It was so gorgeous here most of the day… just leaves down to show something odd happened yesterday.  And a big crack in a hall window at work!  
Aha… the stunt cock is sticking in your mind, eh?  It is a monster.  I must admit my first impression was, “You want me to put that where?!”  But I have been watching videos and getting used to the idea.  I hear a butt plug can make me tighter and better for you.  And do interesting things inside you.  Maybe you should ask for some special jewelry for Christmas, like a ring… a very special cock ring!  Hee hee.  One of my blogger pals wrote a funny post about wearing his metal one to the airport… oops.

It took me awhile to figure out that it’s okay to write about stuff I’ve never done… the first time I typed “strap-on” during a chat (never having seen one) was… interesting.  And I am relieved it doesn’t have to be something I could do.  Some stuff I write would take Cirque du Soleil training!  Though writing gets me a lot closer to doing things!  

I have to giggle at you being turned on by random ladies – being able to see the potential of the store clerk or the accountant.  So many men are looking for the super model and missing the incredibly hot business woman who would rock their world!
Alter ego!  Exactly!  I am definitely the Super Sexy Woman with the Clarice Kent people see.  Sassy is a very… intimate name.  Sass… even more.  They are a secret.  That you are in on.  And that is a very rare thing.  The sexy me.  The fun me.  The wise acre.  She only exists on the internet… and in a man’s arms.  You’ll probably run into the demure lady if we meet… and have to help me get out!  
What’s a cum slut?  Talk more about that… 
 -S
=================
From: Mr Truck
Nov 1, 2012
To: Sassy
I’ve watched a few strap on videos, women on women and women on men. Some hot stuff. Fantasizing about anal is fun but in reality I’d have to stick to something way less than a 9 incher, although a lubed finger is always nice.  I bet you’d look great with a strap on and with a butt plug in. Have you had any ass play experiences? I think it would be hot to fuck you while you have a plug in, or how ’bout slowly fucking your ass while you had a big dildo up your wet cunt? I suppose most women don’t like the word ‘cunt’ but I find it sexy, often more erotic than the softer cuter ‘pussy.’
A cum slut in my definition is a promiscuous (in mind or reality) woman who loves to fuck and suck, swallows and plays with cum, loves it shot anywhere on her body, and loves looking at it in porn, AND talking about it.
By the way, when I eat pussy, I love to combine it with asshole licking. Do you like that?
Yes a little horny today!
xox

-Stan

Slurping sounds

From: Mr Truck

To: Sassy 
October 31, 2012

Thought I’d share this.

Interesting camera angle where all you can see are tits, mouth and cock. I LOVE her sucking and slurping sounds and her heavy breathing…

http://xhamster.com/movies/780441/girlfriend_with_big_tits_sucks_amp_fucks.html

-Stan

Truck fantasies

From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Monday, October 29, 2012 8:12 PM
Subject: Storm stories
Hiya Stan!
Hope you had a good day.  My cable has been out from this hurricane… been trying to send this since about 2 pm!  Wicked bored but otherwise okay.  How are you doing? 
Wow!  Five messages!  You are so good to me.  I’m watching the wind ravage the trees through the murky mist… and now I have something so much better to do!  Let’s see if I can answer them all in one… make it easier going forward.  
Sounds like you had a productive weekend!  Did your family arrive despite the weather?  
Message #2
> I LOVE pussy for breakfast, it’s the breakfast of champions!
I was so wishing there was a man here this morning who would take me back to bed!  This weather seems perfect for exploring and whispering and cuddling and serious fucking! 
> I got a delightful tingle in my ass & cock when you so boldly told me how you’re envisioning me with that stunt cock, a fucking 9 incher no less. Love how you immediately upped the ante from the one experience it told you about.  It’s like you already own my ass (as if I wouldn’t gladly hand it over to you whenever you wanted it anyway).
Own your ass?  Oh my… yes please!  I’ll be very nice to it.  You inspire me… sadly it’s a case of “writing about something I’ve never done” but I have watched p0rn and read about it… many of the sexy bloggers are into ass play.  You should know what it’s like to be filled and have that spot used to its full potential!  
> What’s the biggest cock (rough estimate) you’ve ever taken inside you?
Hmmmm…I haven’t kept track but I think most of them were in the 6-7 inch range.  There have been thin and longer, some quite short… each has its merits.  I actually prefer the average to the huge, which is too tough to deep throat! 
Have you tried a cock ring?  I’ve read articles about them and wonder how they’d make you feel and how they’d feel hitting my clit as you pound into me.
> (Insert your real name here)
Oh, you are so sly.  🙂  Hmmmm…. why?  I associate that name with the demure, boring business lady who is no fun.  Sassy is the only one who talks to men in a sexy way. The demure lady is always going on about risk and mess and I try not to listen to her!  And I feel safer staying anonymous.  No one knows both parts of me. But if you have to know, explain why and I will tell you when I am lying in your arms. Maybe.
>Ah you certainly know all kinds of ways to get my attention, especially drooling on my nipples. 
I pay attention to what you say… find that it makes the fantasies (and then the reality) sooo much better!  
> I’m touching them as I write, wondering how big your nipples are. 
I’ll see if a photo can be had… or do you like to leave some things to discover in person? 
>And I love your gifs, they are like little hot post-it notes for me. I could really use burying my face in your melons today, then kiss you as you jerk me off all over them
It took me while to understand the gifs… but now I adore them.  Just a little something to spark things… like this:
Breast sucking, hips popping
> I’ve had many affairs over the years
Thanks for sharing about your ladies.  Very interesting!  It is nice know you are not new to this and can expand my horizons. 
I’ve never watched p0rn with a man… sounds like a great idea! 
> I don’t think I’ve ever had a love affair where I went completely head over heels, nor where the woman did the same.  
I lost my heart to the old flame… twice.  Once as a 14 year old who had no idea what it meant, and two years ago… when it meant intense longing and ache that nearly broke me in half.  I am hoping to steer clear of that and have fun!  It’s tricky because I associated sex with showing a man how I felt about him emotionally.  But I have started to see if can be more physical and less complicated.
I am so cheered that you are okay with larger women. Guys are so cruel online about it! 
> I put on this girl’s panties once, they were black and had a sizable creamy wet spot in the crotch because we’d been kissing and heavy petting for an hour. It was great, not to cross dress, but to feel her warm wet gooey spot at the base of my balls. Something not many men have felt!  
Interesting and very hot! Most men are very threatened by looking less than manly, but it is just fabric!  I so adore insights into how the other gender feels things.  I could deal with fabric, but not being mean to him about it.  “Nice” is too woven into my personality.
> Ya know, I have sloppy seconds fantasies. I imagine meeting my girlfriend just after she’s been with her other lover. She’s obviously disheveled, hair messed up a bit, has red marks on her neck as well on other parts of her body, lipstick all rubbed off but the stain still visible on her lips. The first thing I do is tongue kiss her deeply while feeling her up, almost rudely, treating her like the sweet slut she and I know she is. Next she is resisting my hand as it makes its way down the front of her pants, feeling her warm crotch, and then putting my hand inside her pants & panties, as we both gasp when my finger penetrates her lips to reveal her juices mixed with her lover’s spent cum…
Yowza that is hot!  I have written about something similar.  Often, my guy pals call me after a meet to brag and decompress.  I took that a step further and imagined meeting a guy for lunch and going back to the hotel room to talk, seeing the remnants of his busy morning, and ending up… seeing if he had any cum left.  🙂
Message #3 Re: erotia
> No surprise you’re a terrific writer of erotica! You do it so well and without even one dirty word 😉 Such great attention to detail and a real command of the pacing and the flow.
Thank you for your praise!  I hope to make it so the man can see himself there, with me, feel the heat… get excited for more. 
Often these ideas take over my mind and I have to write them down to get them out so I can think again!   Most of them are too long and specific to one guy to share, but I will try to find a few more to send.
>Mmmmm nothing like spurting inside you huh? I think you mentioned you like the feeling of warm creamy cum coating the walls of your vagina. Would be nice to use a hand mirror to watch as the cum finally makes its way out of you. A hand mirror would be nice also for you to watch me eating your pussy….Sending you wet kisses on your neck……
You do have wonderful ideas.  🙂
Message #4  Video
> I basically had an open invitation to fuck her with her husband but turned it down in the name of art 😉
I adore your stories!  Did you keep the tape and watch it?  Have you gone on in your mind over the years?   I have a bi-curious blogger pal who had sex with his wife and another man, and really wanted to do stuff to the man but just could not get up the courage… it is a great source of fantasies for him.
Message #5 69
>  I could almost be partially standing up, leaning over, fucking your face while kneading your tits, and spreading your legs to eat you. I like the flexibility that might provide for both of us.  Do you like licking and sucking a man’s balls?
Oh!  This sounds so delicious!  Yum yum… yes… I like to take you deep in my throat and press a finger inside you, and suck each ball in, and rim your ass… it’s my playground!  I want to feel your hips roll and hear you moan and beg or adjust me until it is the best thing you ever felt…
Welll… I am completely revved up now!  Man… I wish you could feel the muscles inside me, clenching. Pulsing… damn. 
BIG HUGS!  And a sensual kiss, too! 
-S
=======================
from: Mr Truck 
Oct 30, 2012
To: Sassy
Hey there Sassy!
Glad you took the initiative to centralize our disparate emails, they were beginning to reproduced like rabbits……..mmm rabbits
My family did make it here.   We all kind of make fun of the storm hype.  I hear it’s much worse down around NYC/NJ.  
Yes you and I would do well exploring each other on a stormy day, or any day. And yes I too write about stuff I’ve never done, that’s what makes sharing fun fantasies so fun! One of the things that really got to me yesterday when you mentioned how you envisioned me was that it was with a stunt cock. I’ve never had a woman play with me with anything but a nondescript vibrator/dildo. So when you suggested something that looks like a veiny 9″ cock with a big head on it, inside me with lots of lube, I’ve not been able to get that out of my mind. I’ve been thinking about you, when I pull off your panties, revealing a nice butt plug buried in your ass. Again, this doesn’t even ever have to happen, just fun imagining it.  As far as porn, I don’t like a lot of the anal sex vids, they just look too damaging with giant cocks reaming a woman’s rectum. The one where the guy is not so big and he’s pumping very slow are nice.
I’ve never tried a cock ring, I understand they’re good for helping retain a stiff hard on, never considered the woman feeling it, so that’s something we’d need to explore….NOW!
That’s nice that Sassy is your alter ego, your bad girl. But I am so turned on by you being the demure boring business lady!  Those are just the kind of women I see in a bank or in the supermarket that I immediately want to fuck. I don’t need your real name.
I’d love to see a pic of your nipples, and I know I owe you a pic of me hard in my boxer-briefs. I’d really LOVE to see a full body pic of you, you can Photoshop-out your head for now! Hey your latest gif is nice, actually my eyes were drawn to her tight panties and her sweet little camel toe.
Who are the guys online who are cruel, not on AM though?  I find that many many men are looking for BBWs, have a natural attraction to big girls and the treasures they possess. When I’m with the wife (who’s short and skinny) I have to be careful about being caught staring at zaftig women. But I like all kinds of women, especially ones who are ‘nice’ like you. Nice goes a long way. I could see us being in love-lust, knowing and appreciating each other and caring in a loving affectionate way, like being in love in a parallel universe.
Loved your fantasy about ‘seeing if the guy had any more cum left.’ I like thinking of you as a cum slut or at least cultivating that in you.
No, the couple kept the tape, I shot it for them. Wish I could see it though. I too have very hotly fantasized about playing with a man in a MFM threesome. I imagine watching and hearing the woman sucking the man, only inches from my face or licking her clit as he fucks her, hearing his balls slap, again, only inches from my face. Then when he’s about to cum, the woman surprises me by holding my head still as he begins stroking with his cock pointed at my face, giving me about a minute to contemplate what’s about to happen. He then shoots his load all over my face. She then begins licking his cum off of me, cum kissing me as we both take turns kissing and licking his half hard spent cock. I like tasting my own cum and it’s so taboo having horny thoughts about tasting another man’s. I think about it a lot.
Mmmm you sucking each one of my balls as you finger fuck me is something I really need, every man needs servicing like that. Imagine the load you’d create inside me by doing that.
Ok I’m ready to jack my cock to some big girl porno…
Talk soon!
Stan

Truck tales

Oct 29, 2012
Re: Hi
From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy
I LOVE pussy for breakfast, it’s the breakfast of champions!
I got a delightful tingle in my ass & cock when you so boldly told me how you’re envisioning me with that stunt cock, a fucking 9 incher no less. Love how you immediately upped the ante from the one experience I told you about.  It’s like you already own my ass (as if I wouldn’t gladly hand it over to you whenever you wanted it anyway). And don’t think that I hadn’t given some thought to taking on something substantially larger after that very hot encounter. I think it’s kind of a natural curiosity or desire that both men and women share once they discover the pleasures of ass play. It’s been too many years since I had that great orgasm, but I’ll never forget how, once I relaxed my muscles, she slowly slid the dildo in and out, but then would pause every so often so she could take in the sight of me on the bed on all fours with that dildo buried half way in my ass and my half hard cock hanging down dripping precum. I soo want you to find my p-spot and me find your g-spot. I’m not big on turning the vibrator on actually, on me they tend to numb other sensations. But I do love the sound of a vibrator as a woman uses it, or I use it on her.
What’s the biggest cock (rough estimate) you’ve ever taken inside you?
(Insert your real name here)
Ah you certainly know all kinds of ways to get my attention, especially drooling on my nipples. I’m touching them and off as I write, wondering how big your nipples are. And I love your gifs, they are like little hot post-it notes for me. I could really use burying my face in your melons today, then kiss you as you jerk me off all over them.
I’ve had many affairs over the years, met some interesting women who became pen pals. There was the one with the dildo, met her on AM, saw her on and off for about 2 months.  Long long ago I had an affair with a woman who I was introduced to by a woman I had had an affair with! Saw her on and off for over 5 years. She was the only other woman besides you that I’ve met who enjoys the finer points of pornography. She would stroke me as we watched, increasing her stroke speed at all the hottest scenes and angles. She too loved looking at and playing with cum. I don’t think I’ve ever had a love affair where I went completely head over heels, nor where the woman did the same.  There was a Hispanic girl I saw for a year or so. She was pretty, long black hair, big boned, probably 225, huge mocha colored tits with dark chocolate nipples. I had wanted to tell you about her because you had mentioned the men who wanted to wear your panties. At her behest I put on this girl’s panties once, they were black and had a sizable creamy wet spot in the crotch because we’d been kissing and heavy petting for an hour. It was great, not to cross dress, but to feel her warm wet gooey spot at the base of my balls. Something not many men have felt!  There are some others I’ll either write or chat with you about. 
The guy you told me about sounded great, I have to go back and reread that if I still have it.  It’s great to share and learn from a woman’s current experiences with other men. I like the idea of a woman with a big healthy sexual appetite, one who might want and enjoy more than a single lover–even if she doesn’t act on her appetite. Ya know, I have sloppy seconds fantasies. I image meeting my girlfriend just after she’s been with her other lover. She’s obviously disheveled, hair messed up a bit, has red marks on her neck as well on other parts of her body, lipstick all rubbed off but the stain still visible on her lips. The first thing I do is tongue kiss her deeply while feeling her up, almost rudely, treating her like the sweet slut she and I know she is. Next she is resisting my hand as it makes its way down the front of her pants, feeling her warm crotch, and then putting my hand inside her pants & panties, as we both gasp when my finger penetrates her lips to reveal her juices mixed with her lover’s spent cum…

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From: Sassy
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Saturday, October 27, 2012 2:52 PM
Subject: Re: Sassy videos
Hi again. 
I am so relieved you didn’t go… “eeww yuck!” at my videos. You are welcome to say, if I send something that doesn’t work for you, but it is great to share the ones that get me going and have you understand why. 
You’re right that I don’t usually pick masturbation vids, but that was not tough to watch at all.. almost sweet.  Her trembling thighs… wow.  And great sound.  And she looks real.  Hard to know whether to watch her expressive face or her hands.  
You write so beautifully about what you’ve done, what you’d like to do… maybe I will share bits of my erotica with you. 
-S
=========
From: Mr Truck
Oct 29, 2012
To: Sassy
I am definitely not a ‘yuck’ guy. I like a lot of things and it’s so amazingly hot to have finally have found another woman to share erotica with.
I was able to film a couple X-rated about 10 years ago on a vacation.  I spent the afternoon with a couple I had met on what as called Web Personals then. They were into exhibitionism. He was a tall kind of geeky but handsome, she was an Amerasian, petite, cute. We walked around some tourist stops, etc. He and I were shooting her (him on stills, me on video) letting the wind expose her panties, or her just sitting on a bench with skirt riding up. We had lunch, did a few hours more of shooting then headed back to their hotel. After about a half hour, they began to engage in heavy petting, so I began shooting. Soon all their clothes were off and they were sucking & fucking. It wasn’t hot at the time because it was unexpected and I was in video mode, more interested in getting the shot right. At one point he motioned to me to touch her, which I did, rubbed her tits and tummy with my hand but felt kind of awkward. I basically had an open invitation to fuck her with her husband but turned it down in the name of art 😉
I know what you mean about 69, and I’ve heard that from some women before. I feel the same sometimes, and I often stop so I can take in the beautiful sight of the woman’s vulva inches from my face while I feel and hear her feasting my cock. I like it both ways, top or bottom but really like your favorite, on the bottom with neck over edge of bed. I could almost be partially standing up, leaning over, fucking your face while kneading your tits, and spreading your legs to eat you. I like the flexibility that might provide for both of us.  Do you like licking and sucking a man’s balls?

Yes I watched football and couldn’t avoid seeing all the storm hype!!!  Stay safe Sassy!  

Mr Truck Toy Talk

From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Subject: Re: Hi 
Sent: Sat, Oct 27, 2012 6:27:45 PM 
Hiya Stan!
Thanks ever so much for your comments.  Wow… nothing like porn in the morning, eh?  🙂
It’s wonderful to share this way – a first for me.  It helps me to understand you… what it might be like to be alone with you.  And that seems like a very good idea! I like to hear your thoughts, until you can’t think anymore and your eyes roll back and… mmm… 
I got talked into buying a box of toys – “They’re on sale!” so I have five sitting under my desk.  Hope to have help figuring out how they can enhance things.  Great that you might have a clue!  
I can get my nipples into my mouth.  Though so far, I’ve seen that as a man’s job!  But might be convinced otherwise… As far as wanting to watch it?  I think that’s a guy thing.  🙂
-S
============
From: Mr Truck
To: Sassy
Sent: Sunday, October 28, 2012 9:06 AM
Subject: Re: Hi
Love porn and sex in the a.m. my favorite time. A box of toys? Christmas cum early! I love seeing a woman lick and suck her dildo before inserting it into her voracious vagina.
Yes I’m up for the job of nipple sucking and about 20 other things I want to do with those bodacious ta tas of yours. I do like sharing them with a woman, both our tongues on them at the same time.
I’ve asked about your ass a few times and I’m almost certain you’ve not replied, but since my track record on email details has been bad lately I’ll apologize in advance if you already covered–or uncovered–your ass.
Do you enjoy 69? It can be fun and gratifying. Have you ever squirted? Some amazing videos of squirter girls.
You had earlier commented about me cuming before the guy in the video does: although I do prefer to shoot my load when the guy does, especially if his is copious, but often there are certain scenes where I focus in on something I want to, or are overwhelmed by that makes me want to orgasm over.
More soon!
===============
From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck
Sent: Sunday, October 28, 2012 10:19 AM
Subject: Re: Hi
Good morning Stan!
Oh, if only I could roll over and find you there!  Breakfast would be delayed…. 
I am seeing a 9 inch vibrating stunt cock inside you… slowly with lots of lube.  Want to find that p-spot that causes all the trouble! 

Or perhaps a tiny bullet with a delightful buzz?  The tiny rabbit key chain makes me laugh… would be fun to hand that to the cashier at the grocery store with my discount card to swipe, eh? 

While you are planning 20 things for my melons, I am drooling over tasting your nipples… finding out what makes your hips roll – a flick of the tongue or a gentle bite and twist?

Hmm… here’s a little breast squeeze for fun

I knew you wouldn’t let me get away without answering the ass question… not sure what to say!  There are lots of words for my chest but my sexy ass?  Old flame dreamed about it for 35 years?  It’s more than a handful?  Maybe you can tell me someday.   
Will you tell me about your extramarital adventures?  That’s the one question you’ve glossed over.  I don’t judge… find it all fascinating, so let it out. 
69 is a challenge… I used to hate it because I couldn’t concentrate on pleasing him while he was doing those amazing things to me! I have gotten better at relaxing and enjoying and sucking at the same time!  I’ve also started to make it a game… who can do better at distracting the other person?  I must say, the guy usually forgets what he’s doing first!  Do you like being on the bottom or the top when all that’s going on?  I am usually on the bottom with my neck hanging over the edge of the bed… but want to try it lots of ways. 
Squirting? I am not sure.  There were a couple of times I thought so… but I was kinda too busy to pay that much attention other than whoa that was… wow.   Is there a definition other than massives amounts of fluid and screaming? 
I should know better than to comment on ejaculation timing!  It’s all good… there are definitely videos where I am way ahead of the ending because of a hand or a cock or a mouth doing something spectacular that twists my insides and makes them roll.  
Are you watching football or battening the hatches for this super-hyped storm?  I took at look at a grocery store parking lot and it’s been a madhouse over there!  
Stay high and dry dear man. And think of the buxom wench!  
 -S

Video exchange

From: Sassy 
To: Mr Truck 
Sent: Thursday, October 25, 2012 8:30 PM
Subject: Sassy videos
Hiya Stan. 
Here are some faves from my modest collection.  
The first two are not my thing but ones I think men like. 
1) Massage and more
the lesbian massage video
  http://www.redtube.com/2210
Since you mentioned an affection for lesbians, here’s a fun little massage video that goes wild.  Good use of oils. 
2) The black gift
http://www.redtube.com/41790
She is gorgeous, the excellent slow blow, her flicking her clit, the lingerie…and her eyes on him.  I like him touching her and hearing his moans.  That’s the amazing Camille Crimson from the “Art of the Blow Job” site that you should check out if you’re not familiar.  She does amazing work over and over.  Music not too cheesy.  
3) My faves – couples being nice to each other
a. The kitchen kiss
A quick .gif to get you going… the way he grabs her ass… yum
b. the bouncing bed – the way he stares into her eyes, the pounding, the changes of position, the way he grabs her ass… yum. 
Let me know what you think!  
-S 
====
10/26/12 9:14 am 
Great great stuff, will have detailed comments a bit later
Thank you soooo much!
p.s. A few straggler questions while you wait: 
1. Your cup size?
2. Shave, trimmed or natural?
3. Pedis and manis?
4. Use your breasts in masturbation?
5. Where did you graduate?
Stan
====================
10/26 /12 11:18 am 
Hey Sassy (maybe a real name soon?)
Might have to jump off and not complete this.
The black gift is great, I know her work, seen lots. Don’t prefer music but it’s kind of nice here. She’s gorgeous, love the way she’s fingering herself and the way he’s slowly fucking her mouth and how he shoots in and around her mouth rather than a facial, kind of different.
That gif is way cool, love embracing a woman’s ass like that.
The massage vid is really nice, although I prefer a less staged scenario. Still, the naked bodies, the touching & kissing and close up tongue action on the labia had me precuming.  I’ll make sure to go back and reply to your observations about the vids I sent. Man, it’s such a pleasure to have a lady friend who can do critical analysis on porn with me. What an honor and privilege.
Stan
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10/27/12 8:47 am
Some comments on your comments:
1) Slow blow
Think he’s tied down?  I keep wanting him to move or touch her or say something… it takes him 4 minutes to moan!  Tell me you are a bit more interactive.  
Yeah he’s way too passive but does a good job holding the camera steady for the most part so I give him a few points! I’m way more interactive than that. When a woman is sucking me like that I freely moan and give her lots of encouragement, touch her face and hair.
2) Chubby lovy 
Very unusual to see a woman this size!  Nice!  She makes great noises.  Excellent use of the rabbit… sexy sucking and use on her chest, and of course lower down.  And the guy using it while licking and playing with her is a great element.  Have you played with toys?  
You’ve not seen many chubby girls online? There are tons of videos and sites dedicated to chubby or BBW. A lot are very hot. Have played with toys a little. One girl I met on Ashley about 5 years ago, used a 7″ dildo on me, yikes! Of course very slowly and with tons of lube. Cause me to have an involuntary orgasm while I was on my hands and knees. That was a surprise. I’ve used dildos on women and love watching women use their fingers and dildos on themselves.
He does make wonderful noises and touches her well while she is sucking on him.  Yum.  Interesting to see reverse cowgirl as the first position… definitely shows her off and the rocking motion got to me.  
That surprised me too since that position is such a vulnerable one for women, focuses only on them, riding and their tits flopping up and down in reckless abandon. You usually see it after a few other positions, after the woman is totally hot and turned on and is in a mind set to show off how she rides
What a bouncy girl!  The slapping sounds during doggie are divine.  And she rode him so well!  His attention to her clit at that point was great. 
I absolutely love slapping sounds and seeing a man’s wet balls doing the slapping on a woman’s ass. As I mentioned before, see her tits jiggle with every thrust is a joy.
The camera work made me queasy at certain points… but not enough to stop. 
Believe me, I have a hard time with 75% of the video I see.
Her sucking her tits creeps me out a little but she seems to like it a lot, so whatever. 
Interesting. I’ve never seen a woman pay such attention to her tits and that was a turn on for me. Can you suck your own tits like that?
Ok on to your video samples on Tumblr!
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10/27 9:13 am
b. the bouncing bed – the way he stares into her eyes, the pounding, the changes of position, the way he grabs her ass… yum. 
You said it all for me! This guy is very intense and dominates her in his lovemaking, that is until she mounts him on top and does some dominant fucking of her own!
As you’ve already gathered, I gravitate toward the rough-around-the edge-amateur market, which itself was infiltrated by big porn companies to the point where amateur much of the time looks pro. Nevertheless, there’s some high quality HD amateur porn out there I’ll share with you:
Women masturbating is probably not your cup of tea, but check out the quality in full screen. I don’t really go for piercings, but she is very beautiful, has a wonderful hairy pussy, and is totally authentic in the way she plays and reacts. She’s being shot by another woman: http://xhamster.com/movies/1111870/lucia_pulls_up_her_dress_to_show_clit_piercing.html