Thursday, August 7, 2014
Sent: Thursday, August 7, 2014 3:45 AM
Subject: Getting together
Good morning Sexy,
I woke up in the middle or the night, and found your email. Thank you for reading my answers to your questions:)
Thursday noon – it’s already today – is fine. Yes, you…me…RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
I don’t remember any one of those places but trust your judgment. Loud vs. quiet – do we want not to be able to listen to each other but only look at each other with lots of lust:), or do we want other people to listen to what we re talking about? Tough choice.
For food I’d go to Border but food’s my second priority. I’d rather eat you with my eyes over there. So you need to decide which place is the most comfortable for our conversation. I gather I’ll recognize you from my dreams:). I am not asking you for your phone #, but if you need to call me or I don’t show up on time, or we don’t find each other feel free to call me.
If you need to make an urgent medical appointment in the afternoon, please do it, you can always cancel it or switch it for the next week if you choose so:).
Sweet dreams, and I’ll see you at noon in one of those three places, please let me know which one.
Sent: Thursday, August 7, 2014 8:49 AM
Good morning! I’m so glad you can meet me today!!
Let’s head for Border at 32 Church Street. It has the right combo of food and some noise to cover our talking. It’s a block from the T’s Church St. exit, or there’s a paid parking lot across the street.
I will wait outside the door. I am wearing a dark blue silk scarf and black top with dark blue slacks. I have glasses and long silver hair.
See you soon!
Sent: Thursday, August 7, 2014 9:08 AM
Subject: re: Getting together
Good morning Sexy,
So Borders it is. I’m also very glad that we can meet today.
Outside the door is fine. I’m not sure yet what I’ll be wearing, light pants and short gray hair, that’s for sure.
See ya! Cannot wait!
I told a blog fan I was meeting a Russian man for lunch.
He said, “NO Russians. Trust me on this.”
I chuckled. “He’s been here since the 80s!”
“No Russians. Really.” I changed the subject.
I mentioned it in chat. A guy there said, “Oh, I’d avoid Russians if I was you.”
“They tend to drink too much, and be very traditional in their gender roles,” he explained.
I have never run in to any ethnic generalizations on any other man. It made me determined to meet him, to see if he fit those patterns.
I was antsy all morning. I got a lot done but as midday approached, I couldn’t concentrate. My boss was away at a meeting, so I could re-read Mikhail’s emails, have all his details fresh in my mind.
Finally the time came to go to the restaurant. I arrived at 12:02 pm. No sign of him. Ugh. I hate being the first one there, scanning the street… is that him? Or that guy? What about this one walking around the corner? No. I pinged a woman from chat to pass the time. She wasn’t around.
Finally an email – “Traffic half a mile away” Okay. I leaned against the building to settle in to wait. I looked up and saw a man crossing the street, smiling at me. Hunh… that was fast! He was tall, slim and… not very good looking. He looked like Mikhail Gorbachev! But whatever. Looks don’t matter to me once I like the guy.
He approached me, asked, “Sassy?” and I smiled. I hugged him. But he didn’t hug me back. That’s never happens! Most men want to hold me, press my chest against theirs for as long as I let them! He untangled himself quickly and I jumped back. He waved his hand toward the door of the restaurant and held it for me. I approached the hostess and asked for a table for two. She seated us in a quieter corner at a four top. He pulled out my chair and sat down on my right. We looked each other over and smiled.
I peeked at the menu but he didn’t. I asked, “Do you already know what you want?”
“We both know what we want. Let’s get out of here,” he said.
I was taken aback and replied, “I’m here for lunch and to get to know you.” I touched his arm and he moved away. Ugh.
It was very hard to hear over the chatter. I wanted a bit of noise to cover any salacious conversation we might have, but this was too much! I made a note to go elsewhere next time.
Plus he had a very strong accent. I like accents, and work with people from all over the world, but this was especially tricky.
I engaged in small talk, “Have you been to this restaurant before?” He shook his head.
“What’s your favorite place to eat?”
He said, “I like lots of places.”
The waitress asked us about drinks and I ordered iced tea. He asked for water. He stared at me. I stared back. He looks like the Cold War president of Russia – Mikhail Gorbachev!
I felt like it was his turn to ask me something, say something, but he just stared. I said, “You said there were so many questions you wanted to ask but you would do it in person…”
He smiled and said, “You sure you want lunch? We can go sit in my car.” Aha! I get it now. He thought I would go off with him without eating and now he’s ticked! Well!
The waitress returned with our drinks and asked if we wanted to order. I said I was ready, and he stared at me then at her, and I said, “I think he needs a couple of minutes?” He nodded and she left us. He made a production of opening the menu and looking at it, and I struggled to keep an open mind. He was obviously upset that I would not leave with him. Argh.
He had told me he likes seafood so I pointed out a couple of dishes I’ve seen friends order and enjoy. He closed the menu and said, “You must come here a lot.”
“I don’t get out for lunch much, but I do eat here with co-workers quite a bit,” I answered.
“You only have an hour?”
“I can push it a bit, but yes, I shouldn’t stay too much longer than that,” I answered.
The waitress reappeared and asked for our order. I got my usual cup of gumbo and crawfish etouffee appetizer, and he ordered the veggie jambalaya. Maybe now we could talk?
“Could you skip out on the afternoon?” he asked.
“Not today,” I answered. I wondered if he was going to ask me anything other than something about how to get me alone fast.
“When did you last have sex?” He asked. Well… that’s a little better but eh… so typical and something that can open a can of worms.
“About a month,” I answered. He nodded.
“About the same for me,” he said and sighed.
“What ended it?” he asked. Ugh. I don’t want to think about that!!
“He got caught,” I said. “And you?”
“What?” He asked.
“How did your last affair end?” I clarified.
“Ah, the same,” he said. “Her husband saw texts,” he added. He proceeded to tell me all about how she was busted and how tough it is to stay safe with all the technology and how wonderful she was in bed, and how their schedules matched and how she liked to skinny dip and that he would miss her, but he was okay now, ready to start again.
I sat there thinking of Kris. How he was intensely curious about me. How he would briefly answer my questions about women he had seen then say it was more than 20 years ago and he couldn’t remember and ask me something else about me. I thought of how Kris touched me, patting my arm, then my hand, leaning in to touch my shoulder and whisper in my ear.
I realized I am not ready. Especially not with this guy! He didn’t care about me… I could be any woman. Ugh. I decided not to share much… I was not going to see him again and did not want him going away with much info.
The food arrived and I made myself calm down and eat. He continued talking about his previous lady! When we had cleared our plates, he paid the bill with cash and I thanked him quite sincerely for lunch. He had dropped a whopping $11 on me. It was the only good part of this outing!
He asked if he could walk me back to my office. I said that was a bad idea – too many people I know on the way. He nodded, asked if I wanted to walk him back to his car. I said I really needed to get back. He asked if we could plan another meet. I said I would email him. He sighed and took my hand and said, “I would like that.” I smiled and said, “I will email… soon.” He got up and shook my hand and left me sitting at the table.
I wondered how long I should wait to email to say thanks for lunch but no thanks. I had to leave some time, to show I had thought about it, but not string him along. I planned to wait until some time in the evening. I tried to work but ended up drafting the email about two hours later and… hit send by mistake! Oops!
Sent: Thursday, August 7, 2014 2:58 PM
Subject: Re: Getting together
It was a pleasure to meet you! Thank you very much for lunch.
I have considered carefully whether to see you again, and I am sorry to say that I can not do it at this time. I thought I was ready to start again, but find myself only thinking of the other man. This is not good. You deserve better.
Best of luck in your search for a wonderful lady!
I prayed that he would not try to convince me otherwise, or say he’d check back with me.
He replied half an hour later.
Sent: Thursday, August 7, 2014 3:26 PM
Subject: Getting together
Thank you for meeting me, and I understand your point.
Good luck to you as well!
Phew. That seems final. Hooray! I closed that door.
I was happy to have tried. Back to the drawing board!